Tag: Reviews

2025 Film Awards: Day Three

On By troubledproductionsIn AwardsLeave a comment

Best Looking

Elio

It’s Pixar, Pixar will always look great, even when they let their story standards slip.

Fantastic Four: First Steps

A lot of Marvel films look the same; this is the first one in a while with a unique look. It has a future-retro style that brings to mind the original cartoon. It looks like what people in the 50’s thought the future would look like. Basically; the Jetsons.

Freaky Tales

I loved the parts that looked like they were from a comic book. It reminded me of Ninjababa, and I loved that movie.

Here

It’s absolutely stunning that a film set in one location with a static camera can look as dynamic as this.

The Woman In The Yard

They made daylight scary. That’s difficult. If anything, I think this would be less scary if it took place at night.

Winner

Avatar: Fire And Ash

I don’t love this franchise as much as most people seem to. But I have to appreciate just how damn impressive they are from a visual standpoint.

Best Music

A Complete Unknown/Deliver Me From Nowhere

If you fill a film with Bob Dylan and Bruce Springsteen songs, it’s going to have a killer soundtrack. Deliver Me From Nowhere has a slight edge because its one of the best demonstrations of the power of live music. It’s not about sitting still and taking it in, it’s about jumping around in a dingy club, losing half your body weight in sweat as you dance with strangers.

Opus

A film about a reclusive musician has to have good music. We have to believe that he is a musician who will inspire a certain level of devotion. Opus manages it. The music is hypnotic, danceable, sexy, and weird. It’s exactly what you expect a character like that would make. It’s helped by how good a job the film does of setting up the universe; it’s very easy to believe that he’s real. But if the music was shit, or was too obviously written by a known artist, it would break that illusion.

Queen Of The Ring

I should have hated the music for this, as most of it isn’t era-appropriate. It somehow works though. The music clearly isn’t from the time, but does a semi-decent job of making you feel part of that time. It’s a risky strategy, but I think it works. The Larkin Poe version of Gods Gonna Cut You Down is one of the best songs I heard in 2025.

Spinal Tap 2: The End Continues

The Elton John version of Stonehenge would earn this nomination on its own. The other songs are good too, but the Elton John one is phenomenal.

Winner

Sinners

I can only really remember two songs: “Rocky Road To Dublin” and ” Magic What We Do”. Yes, the rest of the soundtrack is good, full of powerful and emotive blues music. But those two songs are sensational and are my main memories of the experience. Rocky Road To Dublin is terrifying the way it’s performed here, but also weirdly stirring. It makes you want to stand up and march on an unseen enemy. Magic What We Do is where it’s at, though; a surreal genre mash-up that takes you through over a hundred years of music and shows how much of modern music has its origins in blues. It’s a key scene, vital to the story being told. No matter how impressive the visuals are, if that song sounded like it didn’t belong, if it didn’t flow between the multiple genres effectively, that scene would collapse. As it is, it’s a frontrunner for best scene of the year.

Best Effects/CGI

Nominees

How To Train Your Dragon

I’m still not entirely sure what the point of this movie was (a point I am sure I will say again when the Moana remake is released), but I can’t fault how beautiful this film looks. There are some small visual changes from the original animated movie, but it still sticks to the same visual tone and spirit. The dragons are difficult to pull off visually in live-action: you need them to look fearful enough that you can easily buy that the characters are scared of them, but have an inherent cuteness to them that means the characters do eventually trust them studio can sell toys.

M3gan 2.0

Entirely down to the main character. Yes, she is portrayed by an actual human, but the mix of her performance and effects overlaying it means that you never forget that she’s not human. It’s so well done that I nominated this instead of Companion, which is overall a much better movie.

Wolfman

Sometimes a movie does something so good that it makes every other attempt look poor by comparison. No, I’m not talking about Wolfman, I’m talking about An American Werewolf In London. The transformation sequence in that is easily one of the top moments in movie history, ensuring the movie’s place in the public eye for as long as cinema is a thing. On the downside, every werewolf transformation will now be compared against it. A lot of movies have failed, Wolf Man is the closest thing that has been made since then. It genuinely feels painful.

Winner

The Electric State

Terrible, terrible movie. Among the worst of the year. The visuals are the only thing worth mentioning, and they just about pull it away from winning “worst film” this year. If these visuals were attached to a better movie; they’d be applauded. The movement of the machines is beyond slick, almost human. If anything, the robots are the only thing that DON’T take you out of the narrative. They weren’t overly shiny and “new”. They looked aged, they looked like they’d been through some shit. Importantly, they looked real.

Worst Effects/CGI

In The Lost Lands

Everything looks fake. I’m not sure if the entire thing was filmed in front of a green-screen; but it certainly looks like it. This is not a movie, it’s a videogame cutscene. It’s so bad that I can’t even nominate anything else, because as soon as I saw this, I knew “that’s winning”.

Best Stunts/Action/Fight Scenes

Nominees

Ballerina

The John Wick franchise has set a new standard when it comes to action sequences. The dynamic handheld-camera style populated by the Bourne franchise; now it’s about finesse. Ballerina continues in that tradition. It’s a slightly different dynamic. The Wick films are about someone who is skilled, someone who is the best in the world at what they do. Ballerina is about someone still new to this world, someone who goes into every fight against someone more experienced, bigger, and stronger than her. This gives the scenes a bit more of a comedic nature. It’s still serious, but there’s a sense of realistic ridiculousness to the whole thing, which is a breath of fresh air.

Final Destination: Bloodlines

Part of the fun of these movies is watching the deaths unfold. Seeing how the geography is set up for the events to happen. The deaths in FD: B are set up beautifully, especially with the death of Iris. Does this technically count as stunts/action? Probably not. But I had to give it its flowers somewhere.

Love Hurts

Terrible movie, but the fight scenes were great. Not quite as great as Everything, Everywhere, All At Once. This is nowhere near winning, mainly because it’s lacking “that” scene, one you can recommend to people to demonstrate how good it is. But it is a worthy mention, mainly because of how creative some of the individual moments within the fights are; and for how good Ke Huy Quan is in them.

Heads Of State

Purely for the fight once they crash. It’s fun, creative, and oddly humorous.

Winner

Novocaine

This makes the most of its gimmick; I have to respect that. The fact that he can’t feel pain is key to every scene. None of the fights would work in any other movie. It reminded me of Alien: Romulus in the way it looks at the toys it has to play with (in this case, a guy who can’t feel pain), and bases everything around that. I’m slightly hopeful there’ll be a sequel, because I want to see what else they can come up with. But I would also hate that, because I’m not sure there’s much else left to do.

Worst Stunts/Action/Fight Scenes

Nominees

Havoc

How can this film exist and not have a single memorable action sequence?

In The Lost Lands

I remember when I was at college, and a classmate made the mistake of lightly praising one of the Transformers movies. This set off the lecturer, who was very proud of his film knowledge (you know the type, the one who prefaces every film recommendation with “you probably haven’t heard of it”), and the lesson was disrupted whilst he spent 15 minutes talking about how that movie sucked. One of his main complaints was how poor the action scenes were; talking about how because the robots looked the same, every action scene just looked like shit bashing together with no idea who is who or what is happening. That’s pretty much exactly how I felt watching this.

Karate Kid: Legends

Not that the fight scenes were “bad” per se, but if you’re expecting a five-star hotel and you’re given a leaky caravan, you’re going to be disappointed. Scenes which should be iconic are just “there”. It’s a genuine shame as it brings the film down so much.

Winner

Bride Hard

Earlier (or later, depending on how I lay these out), I talked about how I loved Novocaine because the action scenes leaned into the gimmick; this does the opposite. It has action scenes which disrupt the character. The script wants comedic action scenes, but only knows how to do it by making the lead character seem shit at her job. I also have an issue with what’s NOT there. There are almost no scenes which are exclusive to a wedding-based action film. Let’s face it, there’s a lot of stuff you could use; going through the wedding gifts to find a plate they can use as a weapon (and finding mainly gift vouchers), use sex toys that were planned for the honeymoon, fight whilst trying to minimise damage to the place settings, etc. There’s an entire building of narrative doors that the concept presents, but Bride Hard is content to just sit on the pavement outside, staring at its shoes.

Shelter (2026) Review

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Quick Synopsis: On a remote coastal island, a former assassin living in self-imposed exile rescues a young girl from a deadly storm. As their lives start to intertwine, he must protect the orphan while battling enemies from his past.

Thoughts Going In: Jason Statham is going to punch people. I have to be honest, the first time I saw this trailer, I thought it was a sequel to The Beekeeper, that’s how interchangeable his performances are.

Years ago, I was reading about a script for a Robin Hood movie that was focused on the sheriff of Nottingham. Essentially, he was going to be a CSI-style forensic investigator. That movie was made into the 2010 Robin Hood movie that was just another generic retelling. I can’t imagine a bigger gap between potential and reality than that. Shelter is a close second, though. No, the script was never going to be the best in the world, and you won’t be able to improve on some of the stupidity, but it nearly had a much better director. The original director was Baltasar Kormákur, who has previously directed 2022’s Beast, 2018’s Adrift, and 2015’s Everest. I’m not saying those films are masterpieces, but Kormákur is an award-winning director, so at the very least, he can be depended upon to be visually interesting. Shelter needs that. The action scenes are lacking any sense of excitement. Even the non-action scenes make use of an annoying handheld camera that makes it nauseating to watch. Most baffling is the use of music: there are some action scenes with no music at all. When I first noticed it, I wondered whether that was the film’s gimmick, an action movie with no non-diegetic audio. That would at least be interesting and unique. But then the action scene ended, and the characters got out of the car and started talking normally, and that was deemed music-worthy. What made the non-audio scene so notable was that it was a car chase across mostly rural roads. Have you heard a car chase without music? It’s just a long droning whine (a bit like a speech from [insert politician you don’t like here, even one who is famous for being an entertaining speaker]). It genuinely made me think it was a mistake; that they just forgot to put music on.

There are also issues with the script, mostly logistical. I’m not speaking about “A person high up in British intelligence wouldn’t kill an innocent person just for convenience”, because that would DEFINITELY happen. I mean, “they drove from Scotland to London without being caught on a single camera?” Or when a teenage girl is dragged kicking and screaming into a black van, and nobody seems to notice/care/film it for social media. Top tip: go over to the O2 Dome in London, when all the clubs are still open, and the streets are occupied but not bustling. Then fire a gun multiple times, see if anybody notices, because they don’t in this. For a group of highly trained secret agents, they are shit at being secret. I mean, the main villain shot someone in the head whilst they were surrounded by police. Did that get mentioned again? Nope. In fact, none of the police members who are attacked there are referenced ever again. You’d think there’d be something, some kind of news report at the very least. Is the general public aware of what’s happening? No idea, the film isn’t interested in telling us. It doesn’t even stick around at the end to tell us the repercussions of a former head of MI6 being killed in his own house. I suppose expecting closure for that is a bit much, considering the film states the Prime Minister is in political trouble due to illegal surveillance of civilians, and then is never seen again, and nothing happens to that system. The controversy is never mentioned again. It’s as if the script set up a lot of narrative dominoes, then got bored and wandered off before using them.

I’m not asking for this to be groundbreaking. I’m not asking for it to be an intelligent study on human nature. But I am asking it put effort in. For someone to look at the script and take out stuff it doesn’t need. For someone to think of the logic of some scenes. For someone to make it so that the action scenes are actually entertaining. Shelter had zero chance of being my favourite movie of the year, but there’s no excuse for it to be as lazy as it is. Bodhi Rae Breathnach is pretty damn good, though.

Again, it’s not that it’s a bad film. It’s that even as a first-time viewer, you’ve already seen it. You can guess the dialogue before it happens. There are 1000 movies just like this, so what’s the point of this one?

Mercy (2026) Review

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Quick Synopsis: In a supposedly dystopian future, police officer Chris is on trial for the murder of his wife. He has to prove his innocence to an AI judge in 90 minutes, or he’ll be executed.

Thoughts Going In: This movie is going to be terrible. I’ve not seen a trailer for it; it was dumped in January, and it’s already rumoured to be a surefire bomb.

Films can be bad for different reasons. Sometimes it’s someone involved in it who is just not good at their job, sometimes it’s studio interference, and sometimes it’s just bad timing, and it’s released near something that’s clearly superior. Then you have films like Mercy, films which are so peculiar and flawed that it almost feels like a deliberate attempt to fail. I’m not too big a fan of Chris Pratt as a performer; he’s a good side character, but as the lead, his flaws are exposed, and you realise he is essentially playing the exact same character in every film. He’s not helped by the decision to have him spend most of the film locked in a room, tied to a chair and talking to a computer. You may think my problem would be the “locked in a room” or “talking to a computer” part. I have no issue with that. A guy trying to solve a crime while not being able to physically interact with anything is interesting. My problem is the “tied to a chair” part. If you do that with someone, you need them to have immense screen presence; you don’t need them to have the energy of someone who has just been asked to file a report at work 5 minutes before he’s due to leave. His being tied to a chair means there’s very little to praise in terms of visual dynamics. It’s him talking to a screen, yes, we see things on the screens, but the focus is still on a guy locked in a room ,whilst tied to a chair. He’s not allowed to pace around the room, break things in rage, hold his head in his hands; it essentially robs him of using body language. I’m not sure what the benefit of having him tied to the chair is. Could they not think of another execution method other than “sonic blast to the head”? Could they have not had the room itself kill them with a soundblast? If you want to lean into the computer aspect, have the room change into a 3D reconstruction of the crime scene, and then he can walk through that, have him haunted by the sights, cry at family mementos etc.

In terms of performance; Kali Reis continues to impress. It’s a shame that her performance in Catch The Fair One didn’t lead to the roles she deserves, but I hope if she continues to prove herself, those roles will come. Rebecca Ferguson is a definite highlight, Despite seeming for all intents and purposes, human, there’s something uncanny valley in her performance. Part of that is down to how her character is written. On the subject of characters, Chris is kind of an idiot. He knows he only has a short period of time to prove his innocence, he knows the system will investigate his history, yet he still lies to it. It would have been so much shorter if he admitted things straight up; if he told the system he was an alcoholic who relapsed. Yes, lying to the cops because you don’t trust them is a strategy. But when you’re a cop who’s trying to tell everyone this new AI judge is brilliant, you’d trust it.

A key thing to successful sci-fi is world-building. You need the universe created within to make sense and feel true. Obviously, this is the key to all movies, but sci-fi has it harder because it usually has to introduce its rules first. So how does Mercy fare? Not well. It cuts to occasional riots, but this never really feels like a futuristic LA with a huge crime problem; mainly because they’ve segretated most of the problem people into one area (the ethics of which are NEVER discussed). Outside of that, there doesn’t seem to be much day-to-day crime. The use of hover bikes is a nice touch, though. But they wouldn’t be needed if he was allowed to examine a VR version of the scene himself.

Every time I think of this movie, a new issue I had with the plot rears its head, which is strange as I’ve barely thought of it; I saw it, immediately forgot it until it came time to write this review. It doesn’t bring anything new or exciting to the table. The concept is full of possibilities. Possibilities which the film itself refuses to look at. The problem with AI deciding court cases is one of nuance and human nature; it’s not “if it’s controlled by the wrong people, it may go wrong”, it’s the system itself that is flawed. But Mercy has no interest in discussing that. It also isn’t interested in exploring the guilt he could (should) feel for being responsible for the execution of an innocent man. There’s no “The system I defend executed somebody when it shouldn’t have? Oh no, I caused this!” PTSD, which forces the film to discuss the ethics of this justice. It’s just “this guy died because of me? Ah well. Oooo, is that a sandwich?” Side note: When we see riots in this movie, the police tend to just leave them alone instead of teargassing them. And no children get shot in the face at point-blank range. So in some ways, the “dystopia” America in this movie’s 2029 is less traumatic than actual America in reality’s 2026

This could be great. It could be slick. It could be smart. It’s none of those things. It’s not even passable.

Primate (2025) Review

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Quick Synopsis: Monkey goes mad

Thoughts Going In: Could be dumb fun. Also, I went to grab lunch before this movie, intending to order a small cocktail, I instead ordered a pitcher, which I had to drink by myself in 10 minutes. So this entire review should be read under the knowledge that I was pretty drunk, and based on a conversation I had before the film started, I was trying to think of how Snickers could possibly be a euphemism for lesbianism. and Mars chocolate bars refer to men. No, I won’t provide context.

In 1971, Daniel Mann released the horror film Willard, about a man who befriends an army of killer rats. This was followed by a sequel the following year, called Ben. The theme song (called simply, Ben) for this film was performed by Michael Jackson, and is genuinely very sweet. The rabid chimpanzee in this movie? Ben. The lyrics are surprisingly apt for this film, which meant I couldn’t unhear the song every time they said his name.

So besides my own weird shit, how is Primate? It’s okay. As an early-year blood-filled popcorn horror, it’s good. It does what it needs to, and doesn’t overstay its welcome. There are moments where it’s a bit too dumb to be enjoyable. Characters state that rabies doesn’t exist in Hawaii, then doesn’t bother to provide an explanation as to how it does now. Some of the stupid decisions only happen so that the plot can advance, with multiple people doing things that nobody would do. I can’t tell you that much about the characterisation, because there didn’t really seem to be any. Characters don’t really develop, and only occasionally dip into their personality traits. When I write, I like to do a draft where I cover up the characters’ names, and see if I can tell who’s talking based solely on the dialogue; it’s mainly a test to see if each character has an individual voice rather than just me doing a narrative ventriloquist act. I struggle to think you’d be able to do that with this.

None of that is meant as an insult to the cast; all of whom do their job well. Most of them are relative unknowns, but you wouldn’t know that by the performances. I like that they actually cast a deaf actor in Troy Kotsur, a disappointingly high number of films wouldn’t.

Now onto the best part; the kills. This film is bloodier than the firstborn daughter of Henry VIII. Primate doesn’t shy away from not just the blood; but the pain. When characters get their jaws ripped off, it’s not quick and painless, you can tell they are suffering. I’m quickly beginning to like the work of Johannes Roberts. With this, and the two 47 Meters Down movies, he’s finding a niche as a talented creator of animal-based horror movies. I’m not saying he should be given billions to remake Jaws, but he’d be a decent choice if you wanted to remake The Swarm and make it actually good.

In summary: exactly what it needs to be, but never anything more.

2025 In Film: Day Eight (The Very Good)

On By troubledproductionsIn Year round upLeave a comment

Ballerina
Ups: Worthy addition to franchise.
Really creative fight scenes.
Weirdly funny.
Downs: Very dependent on knowledge of previous film.
Needs better music.
Best Performer: Ana De Armas
Best Moment: The hotel staff reaction to the fight.
Worst Moment: Her reunion with her sister, isn’t given enough time to mean anything.
Opening: Her dad is killed by assassins, she gets taken in by Winston. Very fun action sequence. Shows you that the franchise hasn’t lost a step.
Closing: She meets up with a character who was attacked earlier, who I assumed was dead. I feel he should have been.
Best Line: One bullet, well placed, can change the world.
Original review here

Deep Cover
Ups: Funny, very funny.
Downs: Could have better action scenes.
I would have liked to have seen how this affected their lives.
Best Performer: Orlando Bloom
Best Moment: When they sell the albanians drugs back to them.
Worst Moment: When they drunkenly meet her friends, only because the misunderstanding could have been solved easily. It would have made much sense for Hughs colleagues to be the ones met, have him stand up to them.
Opening: A quote about improv comedy. At least its honest. Then car chase. I don’t think the car chase was needed though. I feel it went action too quickly.
Closing: The madcap adventures have improved their lives. Again, would have been nice to see how others reacted; particularly Hughs old colleagues.
Best Line: You’re from the Cotswolds. You’re not Al Pacino
Original review here

Drop
Ups: Stylistically shot.
Compelling story.
Well-developed background characters.
Good chemistry between the leads.
Downs: Not as smart as it could be.
Loses something in the final third.
So many small imperfections.
Best Performer: Meghann Fahy
Best Moment: The way she gets the gun at the end, so smart.
Worst Moment: The written note to the piano player, mainly because it’s difficult to read what it says, which is kind of an important thing to know.
Opening: Interior Night; a woman is being attacked by her abusive husband. It’s weird as the way it’s presented makes it seem like “this is where we are now” and the rest of the film is a flashback.
Closing: A second date is planned. Very cute.
Original review here

Final Destination Bloodlines
Ups: Some great kills.
Actual emotion.
Downs: Keeps hinting at a much better movie.
Best Performer: Gabrielle Rose. At first I was disappointed that they didn’t get a classic Scream Queen to play this part, but god damn is she good.
Best Moment: Tony Todd’s goodbye. Perfect. Absolutely perfect.
Worst Moment: The end. Every single one of these films ends the same way, and it’s getting hard to care.
Opening: The same way every one of these starts; a massive catastrophe, only this time in the past. Some great kills, and I like that they didn’t spare the kid, rarely made you realise that nobody is safe. It did change from tradition somewhat by the vision being had by a descendant instead of the actual person.
Closing: They all die.
Best Line: Tony Todds farewell.
Original review here

Freakier Friday
Ups: Will always appreciate Chappel Roan music in a film.
Heartwarming.
Weirdly good British accents from American actors.
Good supporting cast.
Downs: Lohan doesn’t seem to fully buy in at times.
A few too many superflous scenes.
Best Performer: Jamie Lee Curtis
Best Moment: The immigration interview.
Worst Moment: Harper in Anna’s body trying to dance. Mainly because it doesn’t feel like it’s actually Harper.
Opening: “Here’s where the two characters from the first one are now”. Anna tries to wake her daughter Harper using “modern” parenting techniques, not knowing that she’s actually out surfing. There’s a MUCH better opening afterwards.
Closing: Tess finds the picture that was taken of her when Lily was in her body. A nice coda.
Best Line: The school had our pension invested in crypto, but since I’m not supposed to complain about it, per my lawyer, it’s neither here nor there.
Original review here

Freaky Tales
Ups: Manages to be both consistent whilst also being different.
Charming.
Great music, more films should use Operation Ivy and Black Flag songs.
Creatively shot.
Some great messages for audiences. By which I mean, it tells you to punch the shit out of Nazi’s.
Downs: Doesn’t set up the telekinesis well enough.
The ending of the second story isn’t that satisfying.
Best Performer: Pedro
Best Moment: The fight at the punk club. There many fights, but this is the best one.
Worst Moment: The death of the basketball players family. Weirdly subdued compared to the rest.
Opening: “weird shit happens” narration. Sets the tone quickly, especially with the visuals and synth music.
Closing: Sleepys advert, alongside the protagonists of the first two segments. Then a nazi’s head explodes.
Best Line: “if there was secret vampires, we’d be all up in that shit
Original review here

Heads Of State
Ups: Weirdly timely.
Funny.
Actually addresses the “but the Prime Minister isn’t the UK head of state”, although IMDB still bitches about it.
Good chemistry between the leadsH
Downs: Tries to be too smart at times.
Takes a somewhat glib attitude to death.
Best Performer: Idris Elba
Best Moment: The Belarus fight.
Worst Moment: There’s a really bad edit where it cuts to black and silence for a bit too long and without the “oomph” that makes it clear it’s deliberate. Had to rewind it three times to make sure it wasn’t my HDMI cable fucking up.
Opening: Tomato festival. One of those things that I’m sure isn’t as fun as it seems. Quickly devolves into spy stuff, starring none of the two main people advertised. Brave, but it makes sense and works.
Closing: Alliances are reformed. The two are now close friends. Incredibly obvious but this movie isn’t made for subversion, it’s for fun. Thats fine, but then there’s another scene showing Comer survived, and meets up with Bissett. It means nothing and adds nothing. The other scene felt like an actual ending.
Best Line: Yeah, well, based on my experience, okay, hope is just delayed disappointment. Doesn’t put food on the table. Doesn’t put a roof over anyone’s head. And if you want to focus on making people “feel good,” then you’re never gonna understand how to help them.
Original review here

M3gan 2.0
Ups: Bloody fun.
The genre change is the only way this franchise could continue.
Great performances.
Heartwarming
Much smarter than it needs to be.
Downs: Incredibly obvious twist.
Inconsistent tone
Best Performer: Violet McGraw
Best Moment: M3gan stops a home invasion. Not as violent as some of the other scenes, but much more fun.
Worst Moment: The villain reveal. Only because I called it the second the character was introduced.
Opening: AMELIA infiltrates an enemy compound to rescue a hostage. She shoots the hostage. Good showcase of what she can do, and some good action moments.
Closing: M3gan didn’t die, obviously.
Best Line: Did you ever consider the idea that killing me was slightly disproportionate to the crime?
You threatened to rip out my tongue and put me in a wheelchair.
I was upset.
Original review here

Novocaine
Ups: Some fun fight scenes.
Genuinely good mid-movie plot twist.
Does a decent job of showing how not feeling pain can actually be a bad thing.
It’s nice to see Jack Quaid in a movie where his female partner doesn’t end up on fire. Makes a change,
Decent make-up on his burned hand.
Downs: A character reveal was ruined by the trailer.
Very one-note. Like an SNL sketch that goes on too long.
The villains are pretty dull.
Best Performer: Jack Quaid, has to be.
Best Moment: The Torture. Hilarious.
Worst Moment: When he gets his bone broken in the final fight. Mainly because it’s shot in a way that you can’t really tell what’s happening.
Opening: Nathan offers advice to a store owner, allowing him some financial peace for a brief period. It shouts “he’s a good guy” so loud it gave me tinnitus.
Closing: Nathan visits Sherry in prison. Delightful surprise that there are consequences to actions. Always nice to see that in a movie like this.
Original review here

Now You See Me, Now You Don’t
Ups: Incredibly fun.
Foreshadows brilliantly.
Handles all its characters well.
Introduces new characters expertly.
Downs: If you think about some of the moments for more than a second, I’m sure it will fall apart.
Gets a bit too ridiculous at times.
The big twist is too easily telegraphed.
Best Performer: Ariana Greenblatt
Best Moment: As always, the reveal as to how they pulled it off at the end.
Worst Moment: The party in Antwerp. Not bad, but there are moments here which do stretch the credulity.
Opening: Crypto dickbags lose their money. Fun, and displays the talents of the new cast.
Closing: Someone we thought was dead turns out to be alive. It’s weird, he wasn’t really missed from this film.
Best Line: Atlas. What’d your mom have sex with a map?
Original review here

The Running Man
Ups: Some fun action scenes.
Sadly relevant.
Adapts the book brilliantly.
Downs: Not quite as dynamic as the directors other work
No scenes which stand out as particularly noteworthy.
Best Performer: Colman Domingo
Best Moment: Elton and Ben defending Eltons home.
Worst Moment: The hostel fight. It’s good, but there’s something about it which makes me think it could be a lot better.
Opening: Simple set up of the universe. Kind of needed.
Closing: Killian is kill(ian)ed.
Best Line: Do not shake your dick at the crowd. That’s a bad note.
Original review here

Zootropolis 2
Ups: Looks incredible.
Vocal performers are at their best.
Important message
Not many kids films will parody The Shining like this.
Downs: Repeats the first one.
Wastes potentially important stories/characters
Best Performer: Ginnifer Goodwin
Best Moment: When they arrive at Marsh Market. Dynamic, and funny.
Worst Moment: The villain reveal, too obvious.
Opening: Summary of the first one. Weird that the stuff they show us wasn’t that relevant.
Closing: They arrest Dawn Bellweather, who has had no impact.
Best Line: The world will never be a better place if no one is brave enough to do the right thing.
Original review here

2025 In Film: Day Seven (The Good)

On By troubledproductionsIn Year round upLeave a comment

Captain America: Brave New World
Ups: Answers questions about the previous films.
Feels like part of the universe.
Fun.
Interesting characters.
Develops the wider story.
Downs: Feels more like a Hulk movie.
Suicidally self-destructive marketing campaign.
The continuity lock-out is strong
Best Performer: Carl Lumbly
Best Moment: The original assassination attempt.
Worst Moment: The reveal of Sterns. Have they forgotten how long its been since we’ve seen that character?
Opening: “Heroes break into a building”. Kind of standard at this point. Reminded me of Age Of Ultron.
Closing: Liv Tyler comes back. And the crowd goes mild
Best Line: Steve gave them something to believe in, you give them something to aspire to
Original review here

Good Boy
Ups: Tense
Good central performance.
Downs: Difficult to see it reaching mass appeal
Lack of a traditional exposition device may put some off.
Best Performer: Indy
Best Moment: Todd telling Indy goodbye. Very sweet.
Worst Moment: When the film flat-out says the house is actually haunted. May have worked better if it were ambiguous.
Opening: Todd moves into a cabin. Sets up that he’s ill very quickly.
Closing: Todd dies, and Vera comes to find Indy sitting on his own.
Best Line: You’re a good dog. No. Boy, you can’t save me. You gotta stay here.
Original review here

Good Fortune
Ups: Keanu Reeves is great.
Depressingly relevant.
Very funny.
Downs: Has all the bite of a gummy worm.
Perpetuates the idea that poverty is a moral failing.
Best Performer: Keanu Reeves
Best Moment: Arj inspiring the walkout.
Worst Moment: The way Arj gets fired. Makes him unsympathetic.
Opening: A day in the life of Arj. You can see why he’s exhausted.
Closing: An invisible taco gets eaten. Jeff supports workers rights. All very sweet.
Best Line: I wanted to show him that money wouldn’t solve his problems, but it pretty much solved all his problems.
Original review here

Karate Kid: Legends
Ups: Charming.
Fantastic chemistry between the characters.
Use of music really makes you feel like you’re in New York.
Doesn’t require previous knowledge of the franchise.
Downs: The two leads are paired together too quickly.
Repeats the first movie (at least) too often.
Best Performer: Ben Wang.
Best Moment: Mr. Han and Daniel showing off, repeatedly throwing Li onto the floor.
Worst Moment: The group fight. It should be better.
Opening: Flashback to a previous movie, explaining how the two timelines connect.
Closing: Daniel and Johnny Lawrence discuss opening a pizza place. The only part of the movie which requires previous knowledge.
Best Line: In life, you only have one question. Is it worth fighting for?
Original review here

Mickey17
Ups: Intelligent.
Great performances.
Sorely needed right now.
Kind of sweet.
Very funny.
Downs: Until it suddenly isn’t.
Repeats itself.
Slow. So very slow.
Best Performer: Pattinson
Best Moment: The dinner. Marvellous misdirection.
Worst Moment: The dream sequence near the end.
Opening: We see Mickey die. Then a quick explanation of how he got where he is.
Closing: The cloning machine is destroyed. Before that there’s a dream sequence that grinds momentum to a halt.
Best Line: I’m still good meat! I’m perfectly good meat! I taste fine!
Original review here

Nuremberg
Ups: Tense.
Very educational.
“People who are evil are still people” is an important lesson. That doesn’t diminish how scary they are, if anything it increases it.
Demonstrates exactly why the case was so important.
Downs: The lead performance.
Misses its mark on teaching you more about the other people involved.
Best Performer: Leo Woodall
Best Moment: When Triest reveals his personal history. Sums up the main thesis of the film.
Worst Moment: How the trial ends; feels kind of underwhelming.
Opening: Hermann the German is stopped by US forces. Sets up his sense of entitlement.
Closing: Text saying what happened to everybody. It’s not a happy ending.
Best Line: I am a prisoner because you won and we lost, not because you are morally superior
Original review here

One Of Them Days
Ups: Funny.
Pacey.
Characters (mostly) feel real
Downs: Occasionally, it feels like it’s moving from one skit to the next, rather than a cohesive narrative.
King Lolo doesn’t loom over everything like he should. Compare him to Deebo from the first Friday movie.
A few too many instances of Karma Houdinis.
Best Performer: Keke Palmer
Best Moment: Hmmm, possibly the section at the pay-day loan company. The blood bank scene is up there, but the reality and satirical nature of the loan company just edges it.
Worst Moment: The “break up”. Only because it feels forced.
Opening: Dreux finishes up at work. Shows us exactly how damn good she is at her job, plus demonstrates the relationship between her and Alyssa
Closing: Their rent gets paid and everything goes back to how it was, just without the threat. Yup, pretty much Friday.
Original review here

Relay
Ups: Tense
Nice use of the telecommunications device.
Low on action, in a good way. Characters like this should not be action heroes, their goal is mainly to incapacitate people until they can leave.
Downs: The villain’s plan depends on so many coincidences.
Lily James’ character repeats her motivations in two scenes very close to each other.
Best Performer: Riz Ahmed
Best Moment: Ash’s drinking reveal. Makes so much sense.
Worst Moment: The twist. Too stupid. Adds zero.
Opening: Hoffman hands back some incriminating documents he has. Plays into the ending, which is nice.
Closing: The massive company is legally reprimanded. Bit unrealistic.
Original review here

Spinal Tap 2
Ups: Very funny.
Characters feel like they exist outside of the film.
Downs: Doesn’t establish how well-known they are.
Some jokes don’t feel followed up on.
Best Performer: Christopher Guest
Best Moment: Simon’s reaction to Elton John “do we need the piano?”.
Worst Moment: The tour in the kitchen. Mainly because it doesn’t lead anywhere
Opening: Director talks to camera. Nice way of setting up what’s happened, and makes sense in-universe.
Closing: Stonehenge related disaster. And there’s some great stuff in the credits.
Best Line: We need to secure your legacy. If, during the gig one, but no more than two of you, could die.
Original review here

The Accountant 2
Ups: Great buddy movie.
Very sweet.
Always fun to see people be very competent.
Downs: Bland McGuffin.
Best Performer: I know I should say Affleck, but really I liked Allison Robertson more. I found her so warm.
Best Moment: The army of autistic teens finding out someones identity from a strangers selfie.
Worst Moment: The opening. Mainly because it’s not needed, and doesn’t fit the tone.
Opening: Death of Raymond King. Bland. Could be in any movie, not needed for this one.
Closing: The brothers go on a trip. Very sweet.
Best Line: The fall didn’t kill him. It was the abrupt stop.
Original review here

The Monkey
Ups: Bloody
Fun
Goes deeper with family dynamics than you’d think it would.
Good performances.
Downs: Some weird moments.
There doesn’t seem to be much reaction to the carnage. The characters seem very aware that they’re in a movie, so treat death with not much reverence.
Best Performer: Theo James.
Best Moment: Uncle Chips death.
Worst Moment: Probably Aunt Ida’s death, only because there’s a moment in it that it only happens because the character is an idiot.
Opening: The twins father attempts to return The Monkey. The Monkey has other ideas and decides to harpoon the shopkeeper instead. Fun, bloody, sells the concept well. Could have been called back to later though.
Closing: A bus of cheerleaders die. Funny, but needless and a bit TOO stupid.
Best Line: Everybody dies. Some of us peacefully and in our sleep, and some of us… horribly. And that’s life
Original review here

The Thursday Murder Club
Ups: Charming.
Good mystery.
Downs: Feels dated
A little bit boomer
Side characters aren’t developed enough.
The “ah-ha” moment doesn’t really work.
Best Performer: Pierce Brosnan
Best Moment: How they get Jason out of prison.
Worst Moment: The moment in the florists feels like a diversion.
Opening: Black and white flashback of a murder. Very noire. The Murder Club are discussing it.
Closing: They solve an earlier murder, but by doing so, are responsible for the death of another resident.
Original review here.

The Ugly Stepsister
Ups: Nice perspective on overlooked character.
Disgustingly brutal.
Lead actress is a great screamer.
Downs: Difficult to care about at times.
The other sister could have been fleshed out more.
Best Performer: Lea Myren. But Thea Sofie Loch Ness is close, and definitely wins the “best name” award.
Best Moment: The toes being chopped off. Dark, but kind of funny.
Worst Moment: Tapeworm, looks too silly to be serious.
Opening: An imagine spot of her meeting her prince, feels very much like a standard fairy tale/period drama. I like that, it lures you into false sense of security.
Closing: Happy ending for everyone involved; the cinderella expy gets her prince, the two stepsisters get their freedom, and the mother gets a mouthful of spunk from a party-goer.
Best Line: “You’ve cut the wrong foot”
Original review here

Thunderbolts
Ups: Actual emotion.
I will always love seeing Geraldine Viswananathan and Julia Louis-Dreyfus on screen.
Downs: Much like Netflix, it needs more Taskmaster.
The continuity lockout is getting insane.
Doesn’t juggle the characters that well. Ghost, in particular, is so underutilised that she’s only mentioned 4 times in the entire plot section on Wikipedia, and three of those are just “she’s part of this group”.
Best Performer: Wyatt Russell
Best Moment: The fight in the void.
Worst Moment: When the kid “dies”. Mainly because it reveals that the people shadowed away to oblivion weren’t actually dead, there’s no way Disney/Marvel would kill a young child in that manner.
Opening: Yelena destroys a facility. There is also a moment before that where she has the cliche “I always thought….” style narration
Closing: The group are officially titled the New Avengers. Feels slightly forced.
Best Line: The most shameful thing of all was thinking that you could be anything more than nothing.
Original review here

Weapons
Ups: Interesting story
Good performances.
Downs: The way the narrative told does mean that it occasionally feels like it’s stuttering instead of flowing.
The town doesn’t feel real.
Best Performer: Amy Madigan
Best Moment: Marcus killing his partner. The first time we truly see the power the witch has.
Worst Moment: Donna attacking Justine. Felt like it was purely there for a Lewton bus.
Opening: Narration over a blank screen. Not off to a good start.
Closing: More narration.
Best Line:  I can make your parents hurt themselves. I can make them hurt each other. I can make them eat each other if I want to. Do I want to, Alex?
Original review here

Hamnet (2025) Review

On By troubledproductionsIn ReviewLeave a comment

Quick Synopsis: There once was a playwright called Will
Whose son became unfortunately ill
His death caused his family a shook
400 years later, a book
And many reviewers said it was brill

Thoughts Going In: This is going to be incredible and moving. I’d heard it was very good, so I was looking forward to it.

There are times when my viewpoints don’t align with those of most reviewers. This may be one of those times. At the time of writing, Hamnet has an 84 score on Metacritic, which means on average, reviewers see it as an 8.5 out of 10 (as opposed to RottenTomatoes, where it would mean 84% of reviewers have given it a 3/5 or more). Many reviews have described it as one of the best films of the year. Don’t get me wrong, I liked it, but I’d be disappointed if this ended up among the best of the year. It’s emotional, perfectly acted, and looks beautiful. But it feels so hollow; two actors in search of a script. It feels like it spends most of its time just spinning its wheels, trying to think of a justification for itself before it reaches the end.

The end is superb, though. When Agnes realises the pain William is in and how he’s channelling it through his work, it’s incredibly powerful. The entire film is building towards this moment, and it doesn’t disappoint. It reminds you just how great an actor Paul Mescal is. For most of the film’s runtime, every scene belongs to Jessie Buckley, who owns every moment she’s in, but the ending is where Mescal shines.

Maybe it’s because I haven’t read the novel it’s based on. It seems like readers of it have appreciated the film a lot; whereas those who haven’t read it are a little more lukewarm. Or I just found it a bit too Oscar-bait, overly artsy at times, where I would have preferred it to be a bit simpler. There’s a high chance it was my expectations that ruined this; I expected Hamnet to die earlier, and for the film to be mostly about the aftermath of that. Nope, we spend most of the film building up the relationship between the characters; setting up the situation, etc., THEN he dies. I get that, it makes a lot of sense. It just wasn’t what I expected, and it’s not what I would have preferred. It feels somewhat cheap to criticise a movie just because it’s not what you personally would have liked, but in the end, isn’t that what all reviews are? If there were a movie called “All Daily Mail Journalists Should Be Shot In The Face”, and it was 90 minutes of justifying why everybody who works for, or even reads The Daily Mail should be shot in the face, I don’t think that paper would give it a positive review, no matter how well-written it is.

In summary; Hamnet is a superb film that’s expertly made and performed. It’s a film that will be studied and discussed for decades, and will rightfully win a lot of awards. It’s also a film that, for whatever reason, I didn’t connect with at all until the final scene. I left the film not knowing more about Shakespeare, and not feeling any closer to him or his work.

2025 In Film: Day 6 (The Thoroughly Okay)

On By troubledproductionsIn Year round upLeave a comment

A Complete Unknown
Ups: Good performances.
Sells the time period it’s set in.
Killer soundtrack
Good chemistry between the leads.
Downs: Incredibly unfocused script
Doesn’t really tell you much about who he was.
The narrative doesn’t build effectively to the end.
Best Performer: Scoot McNairy
Best Moment: The first performance of “The Times They Are A-Changin”
Worst Moment: Dylan and Sylvie’s final meeting. Lacks the emotion needed for it to work.
Opening: Dylan travels to see Woody Guthrie in a hospital. Therein lies the problem; it assumes you already know who Woody Guthrie is and why he’s a big deal.
Closing: Johnny Cash approves of Dylans’ actions at the festival. Pretty cool moment, but doesn’t feel like it really closes anything.
Best Line: It was the Newport Folk Festival then, Bob, and it still is the Newport *Folk* Festival! Not the teen dream, Brill Building, Top Forty British Invasion Festival — a *Folk* festival. Do you even remember folk music, Bob?
Original review here

Elio
Ups: Looks incredible.
Very sweet at times.
Some of the aliens are fantastic.
Downs: Underwritten side characters.
They can do better.
Best Performer: Yonas Kibreab
Best Moment: Olga investing.
Worst Moment: Elio showed the Communiverse. Mostly fine, but the backdrop looks a little fake and disconnected.
Opening: Elio is at a diner, hiding under a table as his Auntie tries to get him to eat. Establishes that his parents are dead (because it is still a Disney movie, so dead parents are a necessity), and how isolated he feels.
Closing: People rush out to see aliens. Very beautiful.
Best Line: Since the dawn of time, humans have gazed at the stars and wondered… are we alone? Voyager is our attempt to find out. This intrepid explorer is on a mission, traveling farther than any human has ever gone, to the distant reaches of the cosmos and beyond. Voyager will never see those who made it again. It will drift on, solitary and alone. But maybe one day, distant worlds will receive its message, and Voyager will complete its mission, proving we aren’t so alone after all.
Original review here

Fear Street: Prom Queen
Ups: Doesn’t skimp on the blood.
Era-appropriate.
I will ALWAYS love seeing Katherine Waterston in things.
Downs: It takes too long for certain characters to realise things.
Best Performer: Katherine Waterston
Best Moment: The prom massacre. Violent carnage.
Worst Moment: The dance-off. Feels out of character.
Opening: Narration of “everyone always said I’d either be dead or a killer by graduation, I guess they were right”, blood dripping off a crown, and cool synth music. Yup, sold.
Closing: Someone gets bludgeoned with a trophy. Nicely thematic way to end their life, and I liked that they didn’t die immediately. They collapse, there’s not that much blood, but you can tell by the way they’re speaking that their brain is fucked.
Original review here

Friendship
Ups: Delightfully awkward.
Allows performers to spread their wings.
Downs: The fact he’s recovering from illness doesn’t come up as much as it should.
It WILL be a difficult watch for some.
Ingrid Goes West did it better
Best Performer: Paul Rudd
Best Moment: He meets his neighbours friends. It does not go well.
Worst Moment: The “welcome back” party. Most of his reactions are stupid, but you can kind of understand them. Here? It’s a little harder.
Opening: An awkward help group.
Closing: A hostage wig disaster. Nope, not giving you more information or context.
Best Line: Look, we had a couple of really nice hangs, but I think it best that we go our separate ways. I don’t wish to continue this friendship at the moment.
Original review here

Here
Ups: Unique idea.
Stunning visuals.
Downs: You’re constantly looking for the next scene to start instead of living in the moment.
A lot of wasted time.
The story is trying too hard to move you
Best Performer: Tom Hanks.
Best Moment: The dementia reveal. It’s built up beautifully.
Worst Moment: The modern family. Mainly because it feels like a massive waste of time.
Opening: The house is built. Really its the only way it could open.
Closing: We see outside the house for the first time. Cute, and really the only way it could end. But ties into my theory that the concept was more important than the narrative.
Best Line: I put things off, and I kept putting them off. And I would say, “Oh, we’ll do it next year.” And then that next year would come, and I’d say, “Oh, next year, next year.” And…
Original review here

Saturday Night
Ups: Fascinating time piece.
From a technical perspective, it’s fascinating to see what goes into the making of a show.
Fun to see moments you recognise and get a glimpse at the build-up to them.
Downs: Assumes you know everything already.
Such a cluttered cast that many aren’t given time to shine.
Best Performer: Cory Michael Smith
Best Moment: The argument with the censor.
Worst Moment: Meeting Alan Zweibel. He is a big deal, and very important to SNL. But we’re not given a reason as to why. It assumes we already know, and that moment will be met with “yes! Finally!” like Freddy Mercury joining Queen.
Opening: Lorne arrives at the studio, showing a mix of nervousness and cockiness. Jumps into the plot very quickly, which I appreciate.
Closing: The show starts. Would have appreciated seeing the culmination of what we’ve been building towards. Even if it is just snippets.
Best Line: Art is but a measure of sacrifice and tears
Original review here

September 5
Ups: It’s always good to see people being really good at their job.
Interesting behind-the-scenes look at the event.
Downs: Feels like propaganda at times.
None of the characters feel haunted by their own choices.
Best Performer: John Magaro
Best Moment: The FANTASTIC rug pull at the end when the truth of what happened to the hostages is revealed.
Worst Moment: “Wait, are they watching this?” Because they don’t feel particularly troubled by it. They realise the hostage-takers are using the footage they’re shooting to keep abreast of developments, and at no point show guilt that they exacerbated the situation.
Opening: The crew is setting up for the day. Considering it’s about a specific day, you have to start at the beginning of that day. I’d have preferred a faux documentary to keep us up to date with the political landscape at the time. We’re thrown into it with no knowledge of what led to the events.
Closing: He’s told he did a good job. Despite alerting the attackers to the police plans, exposing their viewpoints to a worldwide audience, and providing false hope. But those ratings.
Best Line: “So I… I don’t know about the Israelis, but David Berger’s folks are in Ohio, so I’m pretty sure they’ll watch.”
“Then tell them not to watch it”
Mainly because it demonstrates their shitness.
Original review here

Shelby Oaks
Ups: Incredibly creepy.
Rife with lore, all the characters feel real, as does the world they live in.
Downs: Loses focus in the final third.
Not as interesting once it stops being found-footage.
Best Performer: Camille Sullivan.
Best Moment: The format switch. Genius.
Worst Moment: The final showdown in the house, feels too much like a Conjuring movie.
Opening: An explanation of Riley’s disappearance. Exactly how a story like this should begin.
Closing: The death of Riley. It’s a bit of a bummer that we spend so long looking for this character, only for her to die.
Original review here

Springsteen: Deliver Me From Nowhere
Ups: Reminds you just how good Springsteen is.
An important look at men’s mental health issues.
The weird shit? That all happened.
Downs: Invents a character, seemingly just to make Springsteen look like a dick.
Seems to be deliberately avoiding a mass audience.
Avoids a lot of what you want to see.
Best Performer: Jeremy Allen White
Best Moment: When he plays at a local club. It really captures the energy of those smaller gigs.
Worst Moment: The end of his relationship with Faye. He does not come out of that looking good.
Opening: Bruce is on top of the world, which only fuels his anxieties about what to do next. Interesting move, to have him already be a big deal, skipping the usual biopic tropes.
Closing: A “what happened next”. Turns out, Springsteen became quite successful.
Original review here

The Ballad Of Wallis Island
Ups: Much more sedate than you’d think it would be.
Carey Mulligan is lovely.
Downs: The ending switch doesn’t seem as genuine as it could.
Ultimately, rather forgettable.
Best Performer: Tim Key
Best Moment: The peanut butter cup
Worst Moment: Michael chewing out Herb (not literally). Doesn’t seem like the kind of cruelness that character would do.
Opening: Herb arrives at an island, disappointed that there’s no harbour and he has to swim to shore.
Closing: He plays the gig, but for free. Very sweet. Also, very telling that for the song in the closing credits, he chooses his real name, not his recording name.
Best Line: “saying my own name isn’t name-dropping”
Original review here

The Hand That Rocks The Cradle
Ups: Incredibly disturbing at times.
Some great performances.
Downs: Reveal isn’t set up as well as it could be.
Feels a bit pointless.
Doesn’t know what to do with its own revelations.
Best Performer: Maika Monroe
Best Moment: The villain reveal. Truly chilling.
Worst Moment: The lead-up to the baseball bat death could have been shortened by a second. Also, the sex scene felt a bit superfluous.
Opening: A very cinematic fire.
Closing: The daughter has copied Polly’s mannerisms.
Original review here

The Long Walk
Ups: Tense
The Barkovitch characterisation is intriguing.
Brutal and unforgiving.
Great performances
Downs: Could have done with more background into the world.
The central concept doesn’t ring true.
Best Performer: David Jonsson
Best Moment: Ray meets his mothers on the walk. Heartbreaking.
Worst Moment: When they walk up a hill. Mainly because it feels like a cheap way for the film to kill large groups of people.
Opening: Ray is being driven to the walk. Feels a bit of a shit move to make people so poor they’d risk death have to fund their own way to a random part of the country.
Closing: Peter keeps walking after killing the major. Makes sense, but feels a bit sudden.
Best Line: You walk as long as you can. But sometimes the body won’t listen. For some, your heart will stop. For others, your brain. And the blood will flow… suddenly. There’s one winner and no finish line.
Original review here

The Penguin Lessons
Ups: Very emotional.
Cute moments.
Political, but in a way that people might not notice.
Downs: We don’t really know that much about him before he gets the penguin. Which lessens the supposed impact.
Best Performer: Steve Coogan
Best Moment: When Tom meets the militant who “arrested” Sofia.
Worst Moment: The journey to Uruguay. Not a bad scene, but not necessary.
Opening: Tom arrives at his new school, and his shoes are immediately ruined by someone painting over revolutionary graffiti, accompanied by explosions in a nearby city centre.
Closing: We see real footage of the penguin swimming in the pool. Very sweet.
Best Line: I can handle when bad people are bad, but when good people do nothing (CHECK LATER)
Original review here

Time Travel Is Dangerous
Ups: Funny.
Likeable leads.
Depressingly accurate for those of us who have worked in secondhand shops.
Downs: Not that interesting when it goes away from the main characters
Sometimes forgets its own format.
Best Performer: Megan Stevenson
Best Moment: When Ruth becomes a teenager.
Worst Moment: The game. It’s not bad, but it feels like it should be better, with more historical injokes.
Opening: Sets up the story almost immediately. “So we brought it inside, then went to 1945”
Closing: A new inventors headquarters is open. We get to see some of the inventions talked about throughout the film, which would have had more of an impact if we haven’t already seen them. It then goes on, and we see they’ve used the dimension as storage space.
Original review here

Together
Ups: Creepy.
Looks fantastic.
Downs: Loses steam at parts
Characters don’t behave realistically.
Best Performer: Dave Franco
Best Moment: His declaration of love before he attempts suicide. It feels so damn real.
Worst Moment: When she refuses to test it by placing her hand near his. It’s one of those “this would instantly answer questions and stop momentum if she does it” moments, but it can’t give her a decent reason not to do it.
Opening: Flashlight searching in the woods. As in, searching with flashlights, not searching for them. Someone stumbles across two dogs fused together. I get what they were going for, but it looks kind of goofy.
Closing: They fuse together, pretty sure they put this in the trailer, kind of ruins it a bit.
Best Line: It’s called diazepam now! It works quicker if you snort it!
Original review here

2025 In Film: Day Three (The Too Flawed)

On By troubledproductionsIn Year round upLeave a comment

A Minecraft Movie
Ups: Fans of the franchise will love it.
The cast are fully into it.
Some good music.
Downs: No appeal to those who aren’t fans of the video game.
Jack Black and Jason Momoa probably should have swapped roles.
Even for a kids movie; far too dumb.
Best Performer: Jason Momoa.
Best Moment: The minecart escape.
Worst Moment: The title drop, it’s far too dumb.
Opening: Steve wants to mine but can’t as is a child, he comes back as an adult. Overly long, plus I feel it would have made more sense if he first arrived in the other dimension as a child, would have explained how he became so good at building.
Closing: Everybody wins and is happy. The song they play isn’t as good as they think it is.
Best Line: Tell my story in song. Keep it metal, keep it heavy, with real instruments.
Original review here

Black Phone 2
Ups: Great music.
Unique visual style.
Downs: Doesn’t really feel like a natural progression.
Completely unnecessary.
Best Performer: Ethan Hawke
Best Moment: Gwen calls out Finn and her dad. Is the only time it feels more than a horror movie.
Worst Moment: The opening
Opening: A young girl makes a phone call. Doesn’t really look like the rest of the film. Does come back later and tie into the narrative, which is a plus. But isn’t something that will hook people in. Plus, the central performance isn’t great.
Closing: The kids bodies are found and are used to help defeat the grabber. Very similar to the first movie.
Best Line: Oh, Finney. You of all people know that “dead” is just a word.
Original review here

Bring Her Back
Ups: Intense.
Terrifying at times.
Downs: Characters act very dumb at times.
Veers from holding the audiences hand to pushing them into a dark room.
Logically muddled.
Best Performer: Sally Hawkins
Best Moment: Oliver eating a knife. Disturbing as hell.
Worst Moment: The death of Andy. Doesn’t feel earned, doesn’t add to the narrative, feels a bit cheap.
Opening: Incredibly creepy cult footage. Sets the tone well. But leaves questions that the movie refuses to answer.
Closing: Laura carries Cathy’s corpse into the pool and cradles it as the police arrive. The best way it could have ended. I did fear it was going to end with her winning.
Best Line: I’m going to drown you, love.
Original review here

Die My Love
Ups: The two central performances are pretty damn good at times.
More films need to be made about postnatal depression.
Downs: Difficult to figure out what is real at times.
Bad background characters.
Seems like it doesn’t want you to like the characters
Best Performer: Jennifer Lawrence
Best Moment: The build up to the initial sex scene. You genuinely believe they love each other.
Worst Moment: The wedding, none of them come out of it looking good.
Opening: They move into a house, then have sex. Slow-paced.
Closing: They start a fire in the forest, which was alluded to earlier in the film.
Best Line: A thing you love is suffering.
Original review here

Five Nights At Freddy’s 2
Ups: Expands the universe.
The marionette.
The animatronics are great.
The central relationship is still incredibly sweet.
Downs: Feels too neutered.
In debt to much better films.
Best Performer: Piper Rubio
Best Moment: Mike monitoring the animatronics’ movements. Very much in keeping with the original game.
Worst Moment: Vanessa’s hallucinations/nightmare. Not very effectively done.
Opening: The death of Charlotte. Really well done.
Closing: Vanessa has been possessed.
Best Line: It’s so easy to become blinded by ambition even with the best of intentions, you don’t see the devil sitting right beside you.
Original review here

Happy Gilmore 2
Ups: Some nice callbacks.
Believable universe.
Weirdly breaks with tradition by talking about how important tradition is.
Pays lovely tributes to those who have passed
Downs: Repetitive.
Feels very low stakes.
Happy Gilmore is kind of an asshole.
Nepotism. So much.
Too many flashbacks to the first movie, almost as if it doesn’t trust you to remember them.
Best Performer: Bad Bunny
Best Moment: The traditional golfers training. Funny and chaotic.
Worst Moment: Happy’s drunken golf with strangers. It’s an incredibly funny scene, and I loved the other characters. But the fact it kept cutting before the cursewords was weird and felt badly done.
Opening: VERY quick “how we got here”. I’m amazed how effective it was. On the downside, Adam Sandlers narration feels like it was delivered during his lunch break. He then kills his wife, but that’s probably for the best considering how he writes love interests.
Closing: The good guys win, the bad guys not only lose but are humiliated. There’s no other way it could have ended.
Best Line: You look like Freddy Krueger worked at a Starbucks.
Original review here

Him
Ups: Violent.
Intense.
Disturbing
Downs: A tonal mess.
Wastes potential.
Best Performer: Tyriq Wathers
Best Moment: Cam (probably) paralyzing someone. Lets you know the commitment needed.
Worst Moment: The party, too visually messy.
Opening: Young Cam watches Isaiah win a game but severely injure himself. Isaiah then comes back from injury and keeps winning at the same level. Wouldn’t it have been more satisfying narratively if that injury effected his career?
Closing: Mass cult murder. Brutal, and fun, but kind of silly.
Best Line: Transitions of power are never peaceful.
Original review here

I Know What You Did Last Summer
Ups: Some nice callbacks to the original.
Quite funny at times.
Downs: Feels dated
Some people won’t appreciate what it does with legacy characters.
Unlikeable characters.
Some embarrassing callbacks.
Best Performer: Sarah Pidgeon
Best Moment: The death of Wyatt.
Worst Moment: The death of Tyler. Doesn’t play into the killers motivations, either of them. One killer wants revenge on her friends, of which Tyler wasn’t one. The other one is annoyed at the town for having forgotten the murders, Tyler was one of the few people talking about the murders.
Opening: An engagement party. The dialogue meant I automatically hated two of the characters, they were insufferable.
Closing: One of the killers is still alive. This is revealed in casual dialogue. Far too casual. “wearing jeans to your wedding” casual. Tone-deaf.
Best Line: Nostalgia is overrated
Original review here

Roofman
Ups: Sweet at times.
Believable romance.
Leighs characterisation is consistent.
Downs: Should have been a Christmas movie.
Feels too desperate to paint him as a nice guy.
Best Performer: Kirsten Dunst.
Best Moment: When we reveal that Leigh set him up. It would have been too unrealistic to not have her do that.
Worst Moment: The pawn shop break-in. Not followed up on
Opening: Jeffrey needs money to provide for his kid (who he soon forgets about) because otherwise she won’t love him. He decides to steal shit.
Closing: Text saying what happened next. He attempted to escape prison.
Best Line: We both know doing things the right way is not your superpower.
Original review here

The Twits
Ups: Does have some genuinely funny lines and moments.
Margo Martindale and Johnny Vegas are good leads.
Important message.
Accurate representation of modern politics.
Downs: Who’s it for?
Unfocused, going from one plot point to the next without them feeling connected. Feels very episodic.
Not the greatest animation.
Best Performer: Character actress Margo Martindale.
Best Moment: A family coming to an orphanage to refuse taking in an orphan out of fear they’re contagious. Truly crosses the line in a way few films dare to.
Worst Moment: The mayor farting. Even for a kids movie, it’s dumb.
Opening: The framing device; the story is being told by two flies in Mr. Twits beard. We see The Twits have built a theme park. Despite being seen as miserable, they sing a happy song.
Closing: The twits don’t die. Shame.
Best Line: “One of the worst liquid hot dog meat floods in the nations history”
Original review here

The Woman In The Yard
Ups: Makes daylight scary.
Sets up its different narrative pieces well.
Good performances.
Unique.
Feels very grounded
Downs: COMPLETELY falls apart in the final third. Like, drops off a cliff.
Best Performer: Peyton Jackson
Best Moment: The first time we see the woman, it feels MADE for posters.
Worst Moment: The attic moments.
Opening: Ramona watches a video of her deceased husband. It’s weird she filmed that moment, but it’s very sweet, and sets up SOOO much very quickly. Sets up what their relationship was like, sets up that they’re having problems fixing problems in the home, even the way she’s watching it sets up that he’s dead. Genius.
Closing: She decides not to commit suicide, the camera shows a painting signed by Ramona, but backwards. Possibly hinting that she DID in fact, commit suicide. Yay, “your children will be better off if you died” is a totally fine message.
Best Line: Today’s the day.
Original review here

Until Dawn
Ups: Some decent kills.
Bloody.
Decent effects
Downs: Switches between overexplanations and being annoyingly vague.
Survival feels more luck-based than as a reward for smart choices.
No reason to exist.
Best Performer: Ella Rubin
Best Moment: The death of one of the monsters.
Worst Moment: The bathroom scene. Don’t get me wrong, it was enjoyable, it was bloody, and it was entertaining. But it also demonstrated how luck-based the whole premise was. For a game based around “your decisions have consequences”, it’s annoying how the choices have no impact. “Don’t drink water or you’ll explode” is not a lesson.
Opening: One of the characters gets murdered, they’re clearly annoyed at this.
Closing: A car pulls up to a snowy cabin. A clear reference to the game, I assume. It’s shot in such a way that it’s obvious it’s SOMETHING, so I can only assume it’s that. Incredibly unsubtle.
Best Line: Is anyone else growing new teeth?
Original review here

2025 In Film: Day One (The Awful)

On By troubledproductionsIn Year round upLeave a comment

Bride Hard
Ups: You can tell it was fun to make.
Downs: Some of the dialogue is too unsubtle.
Dull music.
Never makes the most of its premise.
Best Performer: Sherry Cola
Best Moment: I guess the kitchen fight, because its the closest this movie gets to what it is trying to be.
Worst Moment: The hovercraft chase looks particularly bad.
Opening: Montage of lead characters growing up and splitting when one of their families moves away, set to a sappy song. Then, “30 years later”, the two are part of a bachelorette group in Paris. I have a small problem; the labelling isn’t clear.
Closing: She sets off the denoator whilst catching flowers. The person whose house is blown up doesn’t seem to care.
Best Line: Is this normal for an American wedding?
Original review here

Havoc
Ups: Very energetic.
Downs: It looks weird. Hard to explain, but there’s a filter which means everything looks like a cutscene from a video game.
Kind of hard to care about anything that happens.
Best Performer: Tom Hardy
Best Moment: The kidnapping of Lawrence
Worst Moment: The inciting incident murder. Doesn’t feel “big” enough.
Opening: Tom Hardy delivers a voiceover over scenes of him stealing, murdering, and performing unlicensed burials at sea. A pretty weirdly shot car chase scene follows, can’t explain it, but it feels “off” somehow.
Closing: Patrick has been shot and will possibly die.
Best Line: You live in this world, you make choices. Choices you try to justify. For yourself, for your family. And for a while, it works. Until it doesn’t. Until you make a choice that renders everything worthless.
Original review here

In The Lost Lands
Ups: Unique.
Downs: Looks like a video game.
Overstuffed.
Characters turn on a whim.
Best Performer: Amara Okereke
Best Moment: The torture of villagers. Effective and personal.
Worst Moment: The train crash, it looks fake as shit.
Opening: Batista’s character walks up to the camera and gives a gritty version of “Are you sitting comfortably? Then I’ll begin”. This would have actually worked in the 1990s, but it now seems incredibly passe.
Closing: The two main characters who have spent the entire film working together decide to work together.
Best Line: The stronger the spirits, the weaker the senses.
Original review here

Keeper
Ups: Atmospheric
Tatiana Maslany
Downs: Meanders around.
Repeats itself a lot.
Some plot holes are vast enough to drive a truck through
Best Performer: Tatiana Maslany
Best Moment: The ending is satisfying.
Worst Moment: The cake. It isn’t impactful.
Opening: Quick scenes of women being murdered. Incredibly artsy.
Closing: Malcolm drowns in a jar of honey.
Best Line: This fork is going in your head one way or another. Might as well taste good.
Original review here

Kinda Pregnant
Ups: Amy Schumer and Urzila Carlson actually have really good chemistry and would make a great double act.
Some funny moments
Downs: It’s hard to like the characters
The premise is too dumb.
Most of the plot only happens because the characters are dicks.
Weirdly shot.
Best Performer: Urzila Carlson
Best Moment: The meet-cute. It’s believable and one of the few times she seems like a human.
Worst Moment: The break-up/threesome proposal with Dave. It feels incredibly fake. It would be like if you invited someone to your house on their birthday and all their friends were there, along with a birthday cake and a sign saying “Happy birthday”, but it wasn’t for their birthday, and you get annoyed at them for daring to think you were planning a birthday for them.
Opening: Two kids “playing mom”, well, pretending to be giving birth, with swearing. Weirdly short and feels like it’s there just because they know they can’t start the film with the next scene.
Closing: Public declaration of love involving a Zamboni and multiple vehicles being destroyed.
Best Line: “I will bite your fucking aorta”. Such a specific threat
Original review here

Matt And Mara
Ups: Some nice moments.
Nice to see low-budget movies get a release like this.
Downs: The characters don’t feel like friends.
They’re not that likeable.
Lack of cuteness
Best Performer: Deragh Campbell
Best Moment: The surly cafe owner.
Worst Moment: The car argument. Feels so forced.
Opening: A somewhat awkward meeting between the main characters.
Closing: Mara listens to music while holding her husband’s hand. She then puts a receipt in a book written by Matt.
Best Line: I’m letting my imagination reach the level of my stupidity, which makes it my reality
Original review here

Urchin
Ups: Some neat visual tricks.
There are moments where it shows you glimpses of how good it could be.
Downs: Unlikable lead.
Too episodic in nature.
Seems more focused on being visually interesting than being narratively compelling.
Best Performer: Frank Dillane. His performance is great, but his character is awful.
Best Moment: The karaoke bar. Three people singing an Atomic Kitten song should be skippable. But it’s incredibly sweet, and the way the three characters do it tells you so much about who they are.
Worst Moment: When he mugs the guy who tried to help him. Mainly because it’s too early on so colours your opinion of him. You spend the entire film knowing he’s a prick. If it delayed showing you that, it would have given us time to get some sympathy for him.
Opening: He wakes up, asks for money and is ignored. Interesting look in how hard that life is.
Closing: Arthouse weirdness. Probably killed himself.
Best Line: Each decision is yours.
Original review here

War Of The Worlds
Ups: Unique
Downs: Terrible CGI
Does this story really need updating?
Feels low-budget.
Product placement.
The world never FEELS in danger.
Too dumb
Best Performer: Henry Hunter Hill
Best Moment: The aliens crashing. Complete chaos, just enough to wake the audience up.
Worst Moment: The reveal of what the aliens are feeding on.
Opening: He logs on and opens up surveillance cameras. Let’s you know the gimmick quickly. Does include a fun moment where two people are talking about how “I think I’m being listened to” and is told to stop being paranoid. It’s interesting and intriguing. Then we see the freak weather, and it looks fake.
Closing: The aliens are defeated. Ice Cube refuses to spy on people anymore.
Best Line: I’m going to go with the tagline: “It’s worse than you think”. Almost like they were trying to warn us.
Original review here

Zero
Ups: Creative concept.
Makes the most of the location.
Downs: Terrible performers.
No style.
Dumb script.
Indecisive in terms of genre.
Best Performer: Moran Rosenblatt
Best Moment: The taking down of America. Depressingly relevant.
Worst Moment: The drug-taking scene makes it seem like the film is pausing.
Opening: Narration over a completely black screen. Did have to check if my HDMI cable was working properly. A guy is asleep on a packed bus in Senegal when someone puts a phone in his hand. He seems confused as to where he is.
Closing: The two characters stand in the ocean and accept their deaths. Kind of poignant. We then get the aftermath of the events; Senegal hates America, then a woman wakes up with a bomb strapped to her chest, but in Paris.
Best Line: “So where are you from?”
“I’m from that place that they signed the Declaration of Independence” Not the “best” line, but the most notable, because it’s terrible. Possibly the worst line I’ve seen all year. No person speaks like that.
Original review here