Films which I didn’t like, but I can at least appreciate brought SOMETHING to the table
Aquaman And The Lost Kingdom
Ups: Great chemistry between the leads.
Potentially good villain.
Momoa is still the best possible Aquaman.
Always fun to see Randall Park.
Downs: Feels pointless.
Boring story.
The villain is defeated too easily.
Best Moment: The trident backstory.
Worst Moment: The final fight, is so underwhelming.
Best Performer: Momoa
Opening: Aquaman is telling his story to his kid. Cute, and a fun introduction to the character.
Closing: Atlantis reveals itself to the UN, something that won’t matter AT ALL as this iteration of the DCEU is over.
Best Line: No one hits my brother, but me!
Original Review here
Asteroid City
Ups: Unique look.
Fun performances.
Sweet at times.
Downs: Dull.
Far too Wes Anderson. I know such a shock for a West Anderson film. But if you don’t like his usual fare, this won’t change your mind.
Best Moment: The Montana/June subplot, because it isn’t really given enough time, and doesn’t seem to be saying anything that’s not said in any of the other plots.
Worst Moment: The conversation between the actor playing Augie and the woman playing his dead wife. Quite sweet.
Best Performer: Jeffrey Wright
Opening: Brian Cranston (playing a TV show host) introduces a televised production of the Asteroid City play. It’s at this point I realised what kind of film this is going to be, and how divisive it would be.
Closing: The quarantine is lifted and everybody leaves. Augie gets the address for Midge, and Woodrow receives a scholarship.
Best Line: We’re just two catastrophically wounded people who don’t express the depths of our pain because… we don’t want to.
Original Review here
Cat Person
Ups: It has some interesting themes.
Depressingly relevant.
Sometimes very funny,
Downs: Loses focus.
Since a lot of the worst things happen in her imagination, it doesn’t seem to ring true how terrible he is.
Best Moment: The sex scene. Fun, creative, and allows you a look into her psyche.
Worst Moment: The imagination spots.
Best Performer: Geraldine Viswanathan
Opening: She flirts with a guy at her work. Not really sure why. At no point did we see WHY she would be into him.
Closing: She meets someone at her work, thus repeating the cycle.
Best Line: Things have changed on the surface, which means they haven’t really changed at all
Original Review here
Dumb Money
Ups: Funny in parts.
Definitely has an audience.
Interesting story being told
Downs: But being told very badly.
Paced terribly.
Doesn’t do a good enough job of explaining itself.
Weird music choices.
Best Moment: Marcos quitting his job.
Worst Moment: Most of the editing decisions.
Best Performer: Paul Dano
Opening: I genuinely can’t remember.
Closing: A very depressing “here’s what happened to everybody”, but it doesn’t have the anger needed to be effective. It seems too morally neutral.
Best Line: “I like the stock”
Original Review here
Ferrari
Ups: Good race scenes.
Doesn’t sugarcoat history.
Does a really good job of showcasing the era.
Downs: Everybody’s an asshole.
Needs more Italians
Best Moment: The aftermath of the crash at the end. Really sells how brutal it is.
Worst Moment: The set-up to that. It foreshadows it way too obviously. Introducing another family just to kill them.
Best Performer: Penelope Cruz
Opening: Text telling us the company was founded in 1947, we then cut to 1957. Not entirely sure why we needed to be told that, and only that. Either give us more detail about the financial state of the company or say nothing.
Closing: The wife dies and finally the son can be recognised as a Ferrari and now runs the company. I think the film thinks that’s a happy ending.
Original Review here
Gran Turismo: Based On A True Story
Ups: Good performances
Interesting story
David Harbor is entertaining
Downs: Geri Halliwell is terrible
The theme of “it’s not like a video game” doesn’t mesh well with making all the races look like video games.
Best Moment: The section at the training camp.
Worst Moment: The crash, only because it’s a little weird.
Best Performer: David Harbor.
Best Line: You get extra points for that in the game?
Original Review here
It’s A Wonderful Knife
Ups: Some very creative shots, where she’s wearing red in a room that’s almost entirely washed out.
The town becoming more nihilistic due to a serial killer is a smart move.
Downs: A little too unsubtle.
Takes a while to become a horror movie.
Best Moment: Weirdo revealing they were going to commit suicide.
Worst Moment: There’s a shot of her exiting the house which is overexposed as fuck.
Best Performer: Jane Widdop/Jessie McLeod
Opening: An advert for a shopping/entertainment destination. Sets up comedy really quickly. Then a scene with the person from the video turning on a Christmas tree, in case you couldn’t tell this was a Christmas film from the title.
Closing: She goes back to her timeline. Somehow Bernie can remember from the other timeline but nobody else can. Maybe would have been better if they left it more subtle and hinted at a relationship starting rather than having her already remember, seems kind of cheap.
Best Line: “I wasn’t Clarence, you were”
Original Review here
Operation Fortune: Ruse De Guerra
Ups: Some funny lines
Talented ensemble cast.
It’s always nice to see Carey Elwes again.
Downs: Lacks identity.
Doesn’t feel very Guy Ritchie
Jason Statham has never come off more Garth Marenghi
Best Moment: The moments with Hugh Grant.
Worst Moment: When we meet the two tech moguls, mainly because of how underwhelming it all is.
Best Performer: Hugh Grant.
Opening: Carys has been summoned and told to retrieve something that gets stolen. A weirdly subdued opening for a Guy Ritchie film. Nice to see him again though. Also, they explain why it’s called Ruse Du Guerre.
Closing: Fortune takes a holiday and invested his money in a movie based on the events of this film. It’s a decent joke but it goes on far too long.
Best Line: “money doesn’t make you happier.” I tell you what, Danny, it fucking does.
Original Review here
Pearl
Ups: Commits to the style
Great central performance
Clearly a lot of research has gone into it
Downs: No likeable characters
Runs out of steam
Best Moment: Pearl’s monologue near the end. Absolutely stunning.
Worst Moment: The scarecrow sex.
Best Performer: Mia Goth
Opening: Time-period appropriate music, sets up the themes well.
Closing: A very long single shot of Pearl smiling through the pain.
Best Line: Her entire monologue at the end, I don’t have the space to type it all
Original Review here

