2025 Film Awards: Day Five

Most Disappointing

Nominees

Havoc

The Raid is a modern classic, Tom Hardy is one of the top performers around, and who doesn’t love seeing Timothy Olyphant in stuff? I remember being incredibly frustrated in the build-up to this, not with the film itself, but with the lack of information or a concrete release date. I was really looking forward to it, and was desperate for it to be released so I could finally watch what I was sure would be one of my favourite films of the year. It’s not. It’s not outright bad, but it’s incredibly forgettable. There’s nothing about it that stands out.

Love Hurts

Maybe this is my fault for expecting something similar to Everything, Everywhere, All At Once. Not in terms of depth, but in terms of fight scenes. That’s on me. What’s not on me is just how bland this is. What’s worse is that you can tell they’re really trying. That’s less annoying than if nobody cared, but it is more disappointing. You can tell there’s a great movie somewhere in the depths, but it never reaches it.

Matt And Mara

I love romantic comedies, and I love dialogue-heavy low-budget films. Matt and Mara just didn’t work for me, though. I think it’s because I didn’t care about the characters or their relationship. Romantic comedies only work when the audience wants the characters to be together before the characters realise it. Defenders may argue that this isn’t technically a romantic comedy, but that’s clearly the vibes it was going for; one of missed maybes and overlooked opportunities.

Nosferatu

I should have liked this. I like dark and weird. But for whatever reason, this left me cold—not in a “this is too horrific” way but in a “yeah, I don’t actually care anymore” way. The only thing stopping me from spending half the film looking at my watch was that my watch had broken. I would have enjoyed that more.

Saturday Night

I REALLY wanted to like this more than I did. It just felt more like a love letter than an actual story. It was created more for the sake of the creators than it was for the audience. I’m not saying creators need to cater solely to audiences, but you need to be aware of them. It’s clear that Reitman has a great affection for the era, but he never gives the audience a clear reason to share that affection.

Wake Up Dead Man: A Knives Out Mystery

It’s weird to put a film that was in the top 10 of the year in this category. But normally, these films are in the top 3, so it definitely feels like a step down.

Winner

Death Of A Unicorn

A film starring Paul Rudd, with a ridiculous premise, a fast-paced trailer, and an opening full of silly, light-hearted jokes. Maybe my expectations for it to be silly and fun weren’t all just me being stupid. I get that sometimes films need messages, and it was possible to portray messages in films like this, but the way it’s handled here is terrible. There’s no sense of fun or joy to any of this. It tries to be The Menu, but ends up being more like a shoddily photocopied discount flyer posted through your door.

Most Surprising

Nominees

Deep Cover

An Amazon Prime original, starring the lead from Argylle, directed by someone mainly known for television. Yeah, my hopes were not high. If you think about it too much, the whole plot falls apart. But whilst you’re watching? It’s an utter delight. This isn’t among my favourite films of the year, but it is one I will watch again, and which I will recommend to people if they have a Prime account.

Fackham Hall

A British comedy released with ZERO marketing in the run-up to Christmas? Screams success. Plus, it’s written by Jimmy Carr, who is very funny, but also makes questionable decisions for his career (Hosting the “top 100 blah de blah” on Channel 4 early in his career? Fine. Going to the Saudi comedy festival in 2025? Nah). Plus, I don’t really give a shit about the genre it’s spoofing, I’ve avoided stuff like Downton Abbey, etc., because they don’t interest me in the slightest. Yet this works. It’s so funny that it broke my brain and made me look for comedy in the next film I saw.

Heads Of State

Very similar to what I wrote for Deep Cover. I love Idris Elba, but he does have a habit of occasionally choosing shit films to be in. This isn’t one of them. His chemistry with John Cena is key to this working, and I want to see them in more. I’m not saying they should remake Lethal Weapon with those two, but they should remake Lethal Weapon with those two.

Winner

Last Breath

I was genuinely disappointed when I finished this film. Not with the film itself, but with how bad the marketing was. Well, I assume their was marketing, it was just done in a way that I never saw any of it. I had a vague idea of what it was about, and that Woody was in it. I didn’t even know it was based on a true story, and that it was set in Britain rather than America. So I was pleasantly surprised by just how damn good this is. It’s everything you want from a movie like this; it’s tense, it’s brilliantly made, and it’s paced well enough that you never get bored. It helps that the characters are believable. There’s not really a villain; there are just people who have to make REALLY tough choices.

I Don’t Get It

Nominees

Matt And Mara (RT Score: 87%)

I genuinely did not give a shit about these characters. Individually, they were fine, but when they were together, they became insufferable. To paraphrase (I’m not confident enough to state it’s a direct quote), It’s Always Sunny: this isn’t will-they/won’t-they. This is I know they won’t, and I hope they never do.

Silent Night, Deadly Night (RT Score: 77%)

Similar to what I’ll say about Toxic Avenger; too bleak, stopped caring. The fact that the victims were all terrible people does not absolve the movie. If anything, the “Yes, we killed these people, but trust us, they were horrid” approach is so transparent you wouldn’t dare use it as a bathroom door. It also means you cheer the serial killer. There’s no horror with the brutality; there’s celebration.

Toxic Avenger (RT Score: 87%)

I feel like the reasons people like this are the same reasons why I dislike it. The tone, the deliberate shoddiness, the needless ultraviolence, etc. It didn’t feel like some of the choices were for budgetary reasons, but more like they were designed to make it look like they were made for budgetary reasons. The cinematic equivalent of pre-torn clothes.

Urchin (RT Score: 96%

Imagine if Bojack Horseman had zero charm and no jokes. It was just a drug-addicted mess fucking everything up and blaming everybody else for it. How quickly would that get frustrating?

Winner

Nosferatu (RT Score: 85%)

Obviously, this was going to win. It was pretty much destined to win from the moment I saw it. I have almost zero positive recollections of this movie. Everything about it either frustrated me or bored me.

Well I Liked It

Nominees

M3gan 2.0 (RT Score: 57%)

That’s an insultingly low score. This is a flawed movie (I genuinely figured out the villain reveal and his motivations within a second of them being introduced), but it’s also a lot of fun. It’s tonally different from the first one, but also feels like a natural progression of the story.

Snow White (RT Score: 37%)

I am in no way saying this was a good movie. But the vitriol it received was far beyond what it deserves; you’d think this movie literally killed children. There’s no way that this deserves to receive as many Razzie nominations as War Of The Worlds, which was one of the worst films I’ve ever seen. Snow White is, at worst, mediocre.

Winner

The Roses (RT Score: 64%)

Nope, I refuse to accept that. I know a lot of people who have seen this, people with varying cinematic tastes and opinions, and they’ve all liked this. It’s hilarious, dark, and has one of the best endings I’ve seen in a long time. 67% is not a failure, but it’s still much lower than it deserves to be. That’s only 12% higher than Weekend At Bernies.

Worst Movie

Nominees

Everything here

Winner

War Of The Worlds

My fear is that I come off too negative. I don’t want that. I read a lot of wrestling reviews where it feels like they hate everything; they seem bitter and annoyed. I don’t want to be like that. I want my love of film to still come through; it’s why I prefer talking about films I love rather than ones I hate. When I left the cinema after watching Eternity, I messaged 5 different people telling them about it. War Of The Worlds? That’s the ONLY film I felt negatively enough that I told people about it unprompted. That’s how bad this movie is; it made me impolite. I’ve never seen a film as stupid, badly written, corporate shilling, and lazy as this. Everything about this is terrible.

Best Movie

Nominees

Everything here

Winner

If I’m being honest, it was always down to three films. A Real Pain, Sinners, and Eternity. Then, whilst going through the end-of-year roundups, I discounted A Real Pain. Don’t get me wrong, it’s incredible, but it’s clearly more flawed than the other two. So down to Sinners and Eternity. One of which has received more Oscar nominations than any film in history, one of which I’ve not even seen anybody mention. It’s incredibly close; it’s the first time I’ve considered co-winners. Then I remembered Five Nights At Freddy’s 2. Trust me, I am going somewhere with this. After leaving the cinema for that, I read that there was a mid-credits scene that’s incredibly important to the narrative. That annoyed me. If a scene is that important, it shouldn’t be mid-credits. But Sinners has that. So can I really give “Best Movie” to a film which does something I’ve criticised another film for?

Then I thought: fuck it, yes I can.

Winner – Sinners

It has one of the best scenes I’ve ever seen. A scene so good it almost made me rude. I said semi-loud “This is fucking cinema”. No film has had that effect on me, has felt as earth-shattering as this has. So it has to win. Fun fact: I genuinely still had Eternity winning until about 3 minutes ago.

2025 In Film: Day 10 (The Amazeballs)

A Real Pain
Ups: Emotional. This film will hit you harder than Mike Tyson, and with less mercy.
Excellent use of time. It somehow packs so much into a short runtime.
It’s nice to see Jennifer Grey again. She’s one of the most underrated performers of all time.
Downs: Visually, it could be a little more interesting.
There are fleeting times when the lead characters seem kind of dicks.
Best Performer: Kieran Culkin. Eisenberg is up there, but Culkin JUST about edges it.
Best Moment: Okay this is difficult. There are at least 4 choices. I suppose I have to go with the group posing for pictures with a statue. It shows everything that works. The character interactions, the warmth, and the sadness. You can show that scene and instantly know the characters.
Worst Moment: The ending. The rest is brilliant, and the actual closing shot is good, but it does seem to lose momentum in the final few minutes.
Opening: David leaving A LOT of voicemail messages. A good way to show his character.
Closing: Back at the airport.
Best Line: We’re on a fuckin Holocaust tour. If now isn’t the time and place to grieve, to open up, then I don’t know what to tell you, man
Original review here

Eternity
Ups: The chemistry between the performers.
Will make you feel things.
Unique.
Shows the difference between young/carefree and lifelong love.
Will inspire discussion and self-introspection.
Downs: Won’t appeal to everyone.
Tries to have every possible ending.
Surely this isn’t the first time it’s happened?
Best Performer: Da’Vine Joy Randolph. Everyone else is great as part of an ensemble; she’s great on her own.
Best Moment: The first trip into the archives. Very sweet.
Worst Moment: The fake Dean Martin. It’s very funny, but it stretches credulity that Anna wouldn’t tell Larry that it was an impersonator.
Opening: Larry and Joan are driving to a party, arguing, but in a way it’s clear that there’s no malice behind it. Larry then dies.
Closing: Joan and one of her husbands decide on their Eternity. Very sweet.
Best Line: Love isn’t just one happy moment, right? It’s a million. And it’s bickering in the car, and supporting someone when they need it, and it’s growing together, and looking after each other.
Original review here

Fackham Hall
Ups: Utterly ridiculous.
Perfect casting.
Some truly classic jokes.
Downs: Some of the jokes are made by the characters long after the audience has made them.
The plot isn’t that great.
The detective subplot feels wasted.
Some people may expect it to be a bit more mature/offensive.
Best Performer: Katherine Waterston.
Best Moment: “Watt’s his name”? Yes, it’s an old routine, but it’s classic.
Worst Moment: The section where he’s arrested feels like it could have more jokes.
Opening: Showing the family. Sets up the jokes incredibly quickly.
Closing: “What happened next”, every joke a winner.
Best Line: “I’m here regarding the murder of Lord Davenport”
“I’m afraid you’re too late; it’s already been done”
Original review here

Last Breath
Ups: Tense AF
Anchored (lol) by great performances.
Barely any time wasted.
Emotional
It’s nice to see people who are good at their job.
Downs: Could occasionally a better job of explaining to the average audience member why certain things are done the way they are.
Needed better advertising.
Best Performer: Woody.
Best Moment: When the umbilical cord is disconnected. Caused genuine gasps in the cinema I was at.
Worst Moment: The computer being reconnected. Isn’t explained enough.
Opening: Drone footage of an unconscious diver convulsing on the sea floor. Along with text saying how dangerous the work is. Almost like a horror movie.
Closing: Footage of the main characters wedding in real life.
Best Line: Back in the day, though, you know, when I was starting out, you only needed two things: little common sense and a good bottle of Scotch.
Original review here

Sinners
Ups: A completely transcendent experience.
Phenomenal music.
Some great performances.
Unique.
Downs: Takes a bit too long to get to the point.
The post-credits point is too important to the plot
Best Performer: Miles Caton.
Best Moment: Come on, really? It’s when Sammie plays in the bar and we see it conjuring spirits of the past and future. It’s a good thing nobody was close to me at the cinema, otherwise they would have heard me say “That? That’s fucking cinema”.
Worst Moment: Some of the deaths in the bar aren’t that clear, visually.
Opening: Sammie drives to his fathers church and stumbles in, bloody and beaten, clutching a broken guitar.
Closing: It’s the 90’s; Sammie performs at a club. Great that Coogler managed to get Buddy Guy in. Kind of weird that ALL of this happens during/after the credits as it feels very important to the plot.
Best Line: white folks, they like the blues just fine. They just don’t like the people who make it.
Original review here

The Naked Gun
Ups: Hilarious.
Damn near perfect casting.
Pays tribute to the original, but not too much that it overshadows the narrative.
Downs: Misses some joke opportunities.
Few too many pop culture references.
Not as quick as the originals.
Best Performer: Liam Neeson.
Best Moment: The cavalcade of “did you get that?” scenes. Utterly stupid but brilliant.
Worst Moment: The snowman scene. It’s very good, but it goes on too long.
Opening: The bank scene from the trailer. Then (and this is the most offensive part), they DON’T do the cars POV for opening credits.
Closing: Freeze frame shenanigans!
Best Line: Like an idiot’s completed jigsaw puzzle, I was being framed.
Original review here

The Roses
Ups: Incredibly funny.
Good chemistry.
Has much more heart than you’d think
“FFS, communicate” is an important message.
Far too relatable.
Downs: A few moments that don’t go anywhere.
Sometimes it feels like characters improv too much.
Best Performer: Olivia Colman.
Best Moment: The final scene. Caused an audible reaction from everyone.
Worst Moment: The almost murders near the end. Seems too far. The marriage counselling scenes also don’t seem to go anywhere.
Opening: The two are at marriage counselling. Allows a perfectly natural “how we met” flashback.
Closing: The two reconcile. Awwwww. Then almost certainly die in a house explosion that we don’t see.
Best Line: If you need a shoulder or an inner thigh to lean on…
Original review here

2025 Film Awards: Day One

Funniest/Best Comedy

Nominees

A Real Pain

At times, this is the saddest film you will see, it will break you. That’s to be expected; it’s about family trauma, mental health, and the holocaust. What you may not expect is just how funny it is. So whether its with sadness or with laughter; one way ot another you will end up crying. The laughs are big enough to just about carry you through the sadness. They’re logical laughs, too. Based on believable character reactions. If you tell people what this film is about it will be difficult to convince them it’s a comedy. Once they watch it though, they’ll get it.

Deep Cover

I was weirdly charmed by this. I think the trailer lets it down, ruining most of the jokes by changing the timing or removing the context. If you think about it too hard, then the plot does fall apart. Thankfully the jokes are good enough to tide you over the plot issues. It could be funnier, there are multiple missed opportunities, especially towards the end. But the jokes that are there are pretty damn fine.

Heads Of State

No idea why, but my brain links this and Deep Cover, so the fact I put Deep Cover in this category kind of meant I had to put this here too. There are some great comedic action scenes, especially the one where they land and fight a random group.

I Swear

When this site was set up over a decade ago, there were some discussions that had to be made. Among those; the slogan. We hit upon “Making you feel guilty for laughing”. Whilst that may not be totally accurate now due to our move away from lists/opinion pieces and towards reviews, I like to think it’s still incredibly accurate when I showcase scripts (trust me, I’ve got one lined up the next time there’s a lull in reviews, and it was written just to see if I can make a VERY dark scene work). That slogan would also be accurate for I Swear. It’s so inappropriate that you can’t help but laugh. I never thought I’d say this; but this will make you laugh at a cancer-stricken woman being punched in the face. It would be so easy for this to cross the line and be offensive, but the writers make it work. It’s also weirdly sweet at times. The scene of him and the teenage girl in the car (it doesn’t go where you think it does) is both hilarious and sweet.

The Naked Gun

Not quite as joke-filled as the original movie, but if it’s a genuine surprise that you can say something like “sometimes there’s a whole 40 seconds without a joke” then you know a film is packed with gags.

The Roses

This got the loudest laughs of any film I saw this year. Absolutely shocking, but also brilliant.

Winner

Fackham Hall

Very similar to The Naked Gun in terms of comedy style and consistency. Fackham Hall wins out purely based on the fact that I’ve excitedly told more people about it. I haven’t felt a need to watch The Naked Gun trailer again (although I have kept an eye out to see if it’s been added to digital services), but I must have watched the trailer for this at least once a week since I watched it. The only surprising part is that a Jimmy Carr movie would be so inoffensive.

Scariest/Best Horror

Nominees

Companion

Not a traditional horror movie, more of a thriller. But I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention this. In terms of actual movie quality, this is probably the best of this list. But in terms of horror? Not quite. The gore is fantastic though when it is used.

Drop

Not quite as close to the horror genre as the directors previous work. But it would be hard to argue this doesn’t belong here at all. It’s such a simple premise, and one which hits straight at modern fears.

Heart Eyes

For 75% of the runtime, Heart Eyes is a damn fine horror movie. It falls apart at the end with the reveal of who the killers are, but before that it’s a modern classic. Brutal, smart, and (importantly), characters you don’t actually want to see die, so you are worried when they’re near death.

Sinners

Actually, forget what I said about Companion. THIS is the best movie in this category, probably one of the best movies I’ve seen all year, in fact (definitely top 3). It is more of a horror movie than Companion, it just takes longer to become one.

The Monkey

Silly, utterly ridiculous. But so inventive and bloody that I couldn’t help but feel warm towards it.

Weapons

I didn’t rate this as high as a lot of people did, but it would be naive of me to not say how creepy it is when it does work. I had a few issues, but they’re pretty much all personal preference.

Winner

Final Destination: Bloodlines

This was a new experience for me. I’ve seen all the Final Destination movies before, but on TV or DVD, but Bloodlines is the first in the series that I’ve seen in the cinema. It’s difficult for a movie this far into a franchise to still feel fresh. The deaths are as good as ever, incredibly creative and able to make you scared of everyday things.

Worst Comedy

Nominees

Bride Hard

I can’t sum it up better than William Bibbiani did in his review on TheWrap:

“It’s abrasively hard to watch. It’s not just that the jokes fall flat, it’s that the film looks like a pile of celluloid got chopped up randomly and reassembled in what the editor could only assume was the correct order, because the script mysteriously vanished”

Happy Gilmore 2

I suppose my main issue with this movie comes down to the fact that in the time since the first movie, I’ve matured as a person (not by much) and as a movie-watcher, and it doesn’t feel like Sandlers tastes have matured at all. The references to the original don’t feel organic, and the film doens’t trust that you recognise them, so they include flashbacks which disrupt the momentum.

Winner

Kinda Pregnant

The key to comedy is truth. It’s why no comedian has started a routine with “don’t you hate when you’re drinking a glass of lemonade and it mutates into a cheese sandwich, but your girlfriend is allergic to dairy ever since she was bitten by a yak?”, because that’s not a situation anybody can buy into, so the jokes won’t work. The central premise of Kinda Pregnant isn’t one you can buy into, and the way some background characters react makes it even more unbelievable. There are a few good laughs; I particularly liked it when she got a classroom to boo a small child, but those moments are too few.

Worst Horror

I Know What You Did Last Summer

Were people crying out for this film? Was there a need for it to exist? The third one is universally regarded as one of the worst horror films of all time (and think of the ground THAT covers). This version has some fairly decent kills, and it is nice to see some of the original characters again. But there’s not much else to it. It’s a tonal disaster, especially at the end. The story falls apart under the smallest bit of scrutiny. The first movie is incredibly closely tied to Scream, and it’s hard to argue against the feeling that the release of this was entirely due to that franchise being rebooted a few years back.

Keeper

Not so much a story, more a collection of creepy moments.

M3gan 2.0

I legit love this movie, but it’s not a good horror. Tbf, it’s not trying to be, but the expectation was it would at least play to horror tropes slightly.

Silent Night, Deadly Night

It had some good ideas, and I will always appreciate watching Nazi’s die (especially on the news), but SNDN was far too stupid for me to enjoy. Similar to other films in this category, the plot falls apart once you think about it. The murders all seem to happen in a vacuum, having almost no consequence on the town. I’m not saying every sentence needs to be “I haven’t seen Bob around, have you?”, but if a hundred people die in a small town, people should notice. Also, the deaths in this aren’t meant to be scary, you’re supposed to cheer them.

Winner

Until Dawn

Videogame adaptations are hard; do you adapt the story, or the general spirit? Whenever somebody says “dude! They should make a Grand Theft Auto movie, it would be sick” I wonder what that would actually be like. The fun in GTA is playing it, not the story, so a film would just be a ridiculous gangster movie. The best adaptations attempt both. It feels like Until Dawn focused on story, and in doing so, ruined what made the games great. I haven’t played the game, but I’ve played the Dark Pictures Anthology games and The Quarry, made by the same company. What makes those games special is choice; how seemingly innocuous decisions can kill people. Plus; you have to stick with your choices. It’s all about consequence. So an adaptation which makes a point of saying that consequences don’t really matter because it will all reset seems to have missed the point.

Most Unique

Freaky Tales

You really don’t see many anthology films, so that alone is weird. But the tone of Freaky Tales is what sets it aside. It feels like a comic book adaptation. The science fiction elements are so underplayed it’s almost as if the film doesn’t think it’s worth mentioning because they’re so normalised in this world. I can see why people would dislike this movie; but it’s certainly charming, and unlike anything else I’ve seen all year.

Here

This is a fascinating concept; essentially the history of a house told in a non-linear fashion with the camera never moving. It doesn’t always work, with the crossfading being a bit too distracting at times. It definitely would have been easier to maintain momentum over a shorter runtime, but I’m glad that it tries. It’s not exactly a success, but it’s too impressive to be a failure.

Presence

A host story (very much NOT a horror) from the POV of a ghost. That aspect is really helped by the flowing camera movement. I may not have liked this film, but I appreciate it.

The Second Act

A film that’s so meta that it almost folds in on itself. Too meta, even for me. This will frustrate the hell out of 90% of people, but the 10% of people who like it will love it. I don’t think I’ve ever been as weirded out by a realistic film.

War Of The Worlds

“Unique” doesn’t always mean “watchable”. I love a good screenlife film, and am always excited to watch one when it comes out. An alien invasion movie made like this is a fascinating prospect, but this doesn’t even come close to living up to what it could/should be.

Warfare

Another gimmick, this time, a war movie that takes place in realtime. Not many films portray the reality of war, this at least shows the horror, how it can completely fuck with your head. Essentially, it’s PTSD: The Origin Story.

Winner

Good Boy

A horror movie from the POV of a dog, I haven’t seen anything close to this outside of a video game.

Saddest

A Real Pain

It’s weird that a film can be in both the “funniest” and “saddest”, this manages it, and is a big part of why (spoilers) I’ve nominated it for best film of the year. It’s not just because of the holocaust mentions, the approach to mental health will also be depressingly realistic to those who suffer (or those with basic empathy).

Key scene: So many options. I’ll go with Benji when he loses his cool on the train. Other moments are sadder, but that’s when the mask falls furthest.

Bring Her Back

I was not the biggest fan of this film, but I appreciate the way it showed parental grief. It’s the grief that adds another dimension to the character, turning her from just another horror movie villain, to someone with relatable motivations; motivations which will break you slightly.

Key Scene: I guess the whole thing. The limits that Laura went to so that she can bring back her deceased child.

I Swear

To paraphrase the film: it’s not the tourettes which makes this film sad, it’s peoples reactions to tourettes which are the problem.

Key Scene; When he gets hospitalised due to a misunderstanding. You can tell that he is worried that that’s what his life will be like from now on. That he is always at risk of someone beating the shit out of him because of something he can’t control.

Winner

Final Destination: Bloodlines

I could spin a yarn about how this movie touches on survivors guilt and mortality, and say this film is on that list because of that. Really, it’s because of one scene, and one scene only.

Key scene: Tony Todds farewell. He wrote it himself, he knew he was going to die soon and was given the chance to say goodbye to horror fans on his own terms. Other movies have been sadder all the way through; but the real-life meaning behind the sadness is why this wins.

Sweetest

Freaky Tales

It seems like the modern world is designed to cause division and anger: from football teams, to wrestling companies, to MCU/DCEU (and even then there’s subdivision between Snyder/Gunn). In those times it’s nice to see films like this; films which demonstrate we can all come together in one uniting perfect ideal; knocking seven shades of shit out of nazi cunts (fuck off)

Karate Kid: Legends

This film was not made for me. It was made for fans of the franchise, or people who, at the very least, had watched one of the films in the franchise. I went in relatively blind; yet was still charmed.

Winner

Heart Eyes

You wouldn’t expect to find a horror movie in this section, but here we are. The romantic relationship between the two leads is what separates this movie from other horrors. The romance is so great that I would have been genuinely disappointed if it turned out he was the killer; it would have actually made sad for the character, just as heartbroken as she would be. Of course, I also would have criticised it for being predictable, but still.

Most Me

Essentially, films which may not be great, but I connected with on a personal level. Films which I would show someone to best explain my taste and personality.

Companion

Bloody, funny, and feminist as fuck. Some people have described this as “anti-male”, it’s not. It’s anti-abuse, and if you see that as “anti-male” then that says more about you than it does the movie.

Matt And Mara

A “platonic” friendship full of awkwardness and conversations that consist of pop-culture references? This is the exact type of thing I write. So it’s a shame I didn’t like this. Possibly because it’s so close to me that all I could see is how I would have done it.

Queen Of The Ring

It’s a film about wrestling, of course, this would appeal to me. The soundtrack is very me too, the cover of Gods Gonna Cut You Down in particular, does feel very geared towards me.

The Ugly Stepsister

I’m a fan of retellings, and few have been done as slickly as this was. A few of these types of movies have been bad, so when it’s done well it’s a huge relief. This doesn’t just retell the story, it brings its own identity to it too. There’s some great stuff in here, stuff that will stick with you long after the credits roll (actually, this was released on streaming services, so it’s actully “long after you get a pop-up telling you to watch something else because god forbid a streaming service actually lets you settle with the impact of a movie instead of just forcing the next one down your throat).

Winner

A Real Pain

A depressing yet hilarious film that touches on mental health, isolation, mortality, and the holocaust? Love it. Plus, it stars Jennifer Grey, who I’ve always had a soft spot for.

Fackham Hall (2025) Review

Quick Synopsis: Downtown Abbey meets Airplane, but not in a plane crash way.

We’re beginning to reach the end of 2025, which means it’s soon time for me to write the annual awards. So I’m starting to think of the best movies of the year. Among the obvious candidates are a film about the power of music mixed in with a gothic tale of racism and American history, a personal drama about trauma and family via a visit to a concentration camp, and a tale about the existence of the afterlife and all the implications of eternity. All very serious topics, all very “big”. Despite how that might make me look; I adore silliness. I like silly, fun little films, of which Fackham Hall is one of the best of the year. Really, the only comparison lately is The Naked Gun, which had the advantage of having an established style.

So, how does this compare? It’s not quite as joke heavy as TNG, with a distinct lack of sign-based jokes which aren’t signposted. There are also fewer background jokes. Basically, I don’t think there are any jokes that I missed that I’ll catch on a second viewing. So I didn’t laugh as often as I did during TNG, but I did laugh louder. I can remember more jokes from this than I can TNG, although that might be down to me having seen it more recently.

But does it stand out on its own? I’d say it does. There was a surprisingly full screening when I went, and everybody seemed entertained. Nobody walked out, which for a film barely advertised and which from the poster you could mistake for a period drama, was a pleasant surprise.

The performances are exactly what’s needed. I’m not familiar with Ben Radcliffe, but he does seem like he’d be perfect in an actual period drama. Thomasin McKenzie is building a weird filmography, which makes it hard to pin down her niche: JoJo Rabbit, Last Night In Soho, The Justice Of Bunny King, and now this. All of those are completely different films, and her roles are very different, yet they’re all somehow still “her”; she’s one of the most chameleonic (is that a word? Is now) performers around. Katherine Waterston is quickly becoming one of my favourite performers, which is odd as I’ve never intentionally seen a film because she’s in it; she just happens to be in films I watch, and happens to always be REALLY good. She has a face that feels like its come straight out of the 1940’s, so she’s perfect for films like this. She also has surprisingly perfect comic timing.

On the downside, the plot is muddled. The murder of the lord feels weird in terms of pacing. The arrival of the detective investigating it turns it more into a Hercule Poirot pastiche than a period parody. That feels like a genre rife for parody, but we’re not given enough time to fully explore that. I would be fully up for a sequel with that concept, by the way. If the murder was cut out, then it would leave a hole that needs fixing (and you’d lose one of the funniest sequences), but I’m sure it could be replaced with something more suitable. It feels like Jimmy Carr wanted to put those jokes in, not realising it might have been smarter to save them for a different film; now he can’t use those jokes and scenes in a more suitable film.

The reveal at the end is a bit too obvious, but not obvious enough that it seems deliberate and is, as such, a joke. Similar to the reveal of the murderer. But I think that if you go into a film like this expecting to be wowed by the plot, you’re in the wrong movie.

Really, the biggest negative of watching this is how it affected my viewing experience of another film. You know how, when you play Tetris or Guitar Hero, it changes the way you see things briefly? All you can see is falling circles and bricks for a while? I went through a comedic version of that. My brain watched the next fil,m and it took about 20 minutes for it to adjust and try not to see a joke in every single action or moment. That’s the biggest compliment I can give this film; It broke my brain with comedy.