Films which I could easily see myself liking, but have (at least) one major flaw that stops me from doing so.

Argylle
Ups: Some funny moments.
Good ensemble cast.
Some good twists.
Downs: The central mystery isn’t that compelling.
Bad CGI.
Feels severely neutered by its rating.
Best Performer: Henry Cavill
Best Moment: When we find out who her “dad” is, it has the potential for an incredibly tense section (which it then doesn’t live up to).
Worst Moment: The smoke-filled action scene. Possibly the oil-skating too.
Opening: Elly has writer’s block. We also see a scene from the Argylle books. I think it’s supposed to be shocking that it’s not real, but we already knew from the trailer.
Closing: A random Henry Cavill appears. The audience asks questions, which will go unanswered unless there’s a sequel.
Best Line: The greater the spy, the bigger the lie.
Original review here

Dear Santa
Ups: Cate Freedman is fun.
Better than Borderlands.
Good idea.
Downs: Never moves past that idea.
Inconsistency in terms of intended audience.
No heart.
Best Performer: Cate Freedman, she’s only in it briefly, but I love her.
Best Moment: “Santa” first meeting Liam.
Worst Moment: The concert. One of many moments where it feels like a scene from a kids movie placed in middle of a more mature one.
Opening: Christmas music, Christmas decorations on a house. This sets the tone VERY quickly. The song then distorts over a shot of a less decorated house. There are some very passive-aggressive arguments from the parents.
Closing: His final wish becomes true. Very sweet but it doesn’t show how it was explained in this universe.
Best Line: “You’re Santa? I thought you’d be jolly”
“Who’s jolly nowadays?”
“Fair point”
Original review here

Godzilla X Kong: The New Empire
Ups: The titans themselves look great.
Some decent performances.
Funny.
Downs: It’s difficult to work out how big they are supposed to be.
Assumes you can remember more about the previous films than you actually can.
Doesn’t show enough of the human cost.
Best Performer: The little kid.
Best Moment: The Egypt fight.
Worst Moment: The final fight. All the issues the film has combined into one; buildings get damaged but almost silently so it feels like nobody was in them and nobody was injured. It’s over too quickly.
Opening: Kong is now old. Shows us this rather than telling us, displaying how he’s old, he’s tired, and he’s hunting f*cking children. Also shows off his immense strength.
Closing: Kong goes back to earth, and Godzilla has a little nap in the Colosseum.
Best Line: I’m scared something is wrong with me
Original review here

I.S.S
Ups: Good zero gravity effects.
Nice look at how people become pawns in government warfare.
Downs: No emotional resonance.
Forgettable
Best Performer: Ariana DeBose
Best Moment: The first nuclear explosions.
Worst Moment: The death of Weronika feels overly contrived.
Opening: Two astronauts meet up with the rest on the ISS. Makes sense as a way of introducing everybody, but kind of means that the bond between the group isn’t there, so the paranoia isn’t as effective.
Closing: Plummet to earth. With no idea of what awaits them.
Best Line: “If WE got orders from our government to take control…..”
Original review here

Lisa Frankenstein
Ups: Kathryn Newton’s wardrobe is on point.
Some really good visuals.
Sweet
Downs: Too Cody script.
The penis reveal comes too late
Best Performer: Kathryn Newton
Best Moment: The REO Speedwagon song.
Worst Moment: The axe-throwing murder feels too slow.
Opening: Black and white opening credits which reminded me of Lotte Reiniger.
Closing: Kathryn Newton’s character dies, but then gets better.
Best Line: “When I said I wanted to be with you I meant in the ground dead because people are jerk offs”
Original review here

Mean Girls
Ups: Some good moments when it gets meta.
It’s always nice to see Tina Fey on screen.
Downs: The songs aren’t that memorable.
Doesn’t justify its existence.
Seems to be aimed more at Plastics than at Cadys.
Best Performer: Auliʻi Cravalho
Best Moment: Revenge Party.
Worst Moment: All the moments where they overly sexualise child characters.
Opening: A song recorded on a phone. The transition from mobile to wide-screen was nicely done, but in my opinion, a musical has to start BIG. This starts in the smallest possible way, with a song on a mobile phone, and then the main character isolated in the wilderness.
Closing: An overly emotional song. Then a party montage that for some reason lacks fun.
Best Line: “I’m sorry I said you were dragging during revenge party, we just needed to move the story along”
Original review here

Red One
Ups: Incorporates Christmas myths and legends in an interesting way.
Funny.
Always nice to see Bonnie Hunt.
Downs: Tonally inconsistent.
Chris Evans is miscast.
Suicidally bad release date.
Best Performer: Kiernan Shipka. Does a good job of seeming very old whilst being young.
Best Moment: Krampusscchlap
Worst Moment: Nick Kroll possession. Very difficult to take seriously.
Opening: Santa’s bodyguard has become disillusioned with Christmas. Probably because he saw Mrs. Browns Boys had been scheduled again.
Closing: Callum doesn’t retire, having had his Christmas spirit/desire for a franchise returned.
Best Line: We know that somewhere inside every lost grown-up is the kid they once were. Our gift is that we can see that even when they can’t.
Original review here

The Whip
Ups: Important.
Fun lines.
Hopeful.
Downs: Visually, it has ambitions above its budget at times.
It is weird how the only character with a disability is in a small handful of scenes
Features one of the worst performances of the year. We’re talking “early years in low-budget porn” bad. I mentioned this to the only other person I know who has seen this, and they instantly knew which person I meant.
Best Performer: Shian Denovan
Best Moment: The “Gathering The Team” section. It’s difficult to watch that and NOT feel like you want to fuck shit up.
Worst Moment: When the plan is discussed on the bridge. Mainly because it’s weirdly staged. The next scene takes place on a bench nearby, and I feel that bench would have made a better setting than the awkward walk and talk.
Opening: The plan works, the country is in chaos. The story actually continues over the credits though, being told by newspaper headlines whilst the credits are going on (the actors are shown alongside their picture on front page of newspapers, and then smaller headlines link at the chaos). Fucking genius.
Closing: Newsposition. Done in a way that actually makes sense. Also, I love the opening credits for this. They’re written down in a notepad before appearing on screen.
Best Line: Of course they didn’t get it (the governments message), they’re not supposed to get it, if they got it they’d be furious
Original review here

Unfrosted
Ups: Funny.
Never boring.
Downs: Jerry Seinfeld can’t act.
A bit TOO silly at times.
Comedic actors aren’t used to their strengths.
Best Performer: Hugh Grant.
Best Moment: The market research with the two kids.
Worst Moment: The closing credits. Mainly because the song they chose sounds like a royalty free song so it makes it feel low budget.
Opening: A little kid orders some pop tarts at a cafe “leave the box” and sits next to the creator of Pop-Tarts, who insists on telling him the story. Funny, and sets up that this isn’t a film that takes itself seriously.
Closing: Standard “where are they now” closing.
Best Line: “Isn’t this a cereal company? Why did my husband explode?”
Original review here